V's Photo Blog

We Inturrupt this Dissercation for a Breif Message About Black People as "Internet Sensations": A Note About Neo-Minstrelsy

2010-08-10T13:31:00.003-04:00

I know, I know, I'm supposed to be on my dissercation relaxing and taking a break from critical race analysis. But racist stuff still happens and, per usual, there is nothing I can do about it. All I can do is blog about to relax my mind and return me to my dissercation.

By now I hope you've seen this video:

And thus Antoine Dodson became an internet sensation. In a later interview about his internet stardom he explained how upset he was and that he hoped his conduct on regional television would spur authorities into action. You see, his sister was physically assaulted while her little girl was asleep beside her. He actually exhibits the appropriate amount of outrage and anger in his interview. His interview is in sharp contrast to the news casters who later pat themselves on the back for creating an internet star out of "people like Antoine" instead of focusing on the rapist who was, at the time of the interview, still loose.

Part of Antoine Dodson's appeal is that he is a reasonably upset out gay man who is rushed to defend his family from attack. On his website he's soft spoken, a little shy, and quite sweet. When I first saw the newscast posted on a popular blog I posted it to my facebook page. The dissonance of the white newscasters calm and Dodson's anger and outrage is pointed, and the source of the clips comic appeal. Dodson's sister, the victim, provides a heart breaking foil to both reactions: she's blasé. Her reaction communicates that this sort of thing happens all the time, that she doesn't expect her story to really catalyst any official response, and that she doesn't see anyway out of her life "out here in the projects."

This video differs from this one about a "leprechaun sighting" in Alabama and this one about "whistler tips" on car mufflers in Oakland. Both feature working class and poor African Americans as either annoyances to white people or buffoons. Some of the humor comes from the reactions of the reporters involved in each story. But the joke is on each news cast's Black interviewees.

Dodson's story has actually generated enough revenue to help his family leave their apartment in the projects. He has a website, merchandise, and a news single auto tuned from his appearance on the news. The proceeds from his website go to his family and to a childhood diabetes foundation (Type One Diabetes) because both his sister and her young daughter, who recently passed away, both suffered from the disease. In the end I think Antoine Dodson accomplished his mission: he raised awareness of the rapist loose in his community, he exposed the official response as inadequate, and his new website succeeds in possitively portraying an out gay man who loves his family. His time in school for business is obviously paying off for his family in the wake of his internet stardom. I'm really happy for him and his family: that no one was hurt and that they were able to turn such a negative event into a better situation for his family. And that is why I bought his single on iTunes.

The People Who Look Like You UPDATED

2010-08-09T13:22:00.005-04:00

Spending time with the people who look like you and their kids sometimes means living through some interesting genetic moments. Genes are funny things. You never know what traits will pass on or who will exhibit them. You never know when a smaller version of someone you already know will sprout up. This weekend I ventured east to see my aunt and cousins. I look like the cousins I just visited. This is mostly because we all have my grandma's eyes. They're almond shaped and so dark you can't tell the pupil from the iris. There are a few variations on my grandma's eyes one cousin's eyes are a little lighter, one cousin's eyes aren't quite almond shaped, but they're all similar enough to make us all look related. One version, a squint that comes from the grandpa I share with these cousins, was passed on to my oldest cousin and to my younger brother. Are you following this? Grandma eyes +Grandpa squint = cousin and brother's eyes. That same cousin passed these eyes on to her oldest son, the son she named for my brother. Now stay with me. Let's use the transitive property to explain this (if a=b and b=c, then a=c): cousin's eyes = my brother's eyes, cousin's eyes = oldest son's eyes, meaning little cousin's eyes = my brother's eyes. Got it? My little two year old cousin has my brother's eyes. Aren't genetics fun?

Sure there are rules about dominant traits and such but my other cousin's Punnett square* only worked out in favor of recessive traits. She has dark hair and dark eyes. Her kids have blond hair and blue eyes like her husband. One of her kids has her paternal grandfather's baby blue eyes. So, yeah, there are odds in this craps shoot, but odds are sometimes beaten.

All of this is to say that my two year old cousin looks like my brother. My first memories of my younger brother start around when he was two years old. I was four by then. I remember going to the hospital to meet him only to be turned away because of my exposure to chicken pox when I was two. I remember his first steps when he was about one. But most of my memories of him start when he was about two years old. Thus, this weekend while I was playing with my two year old cousin I had flash backs to a time when I ran around my house with my two year old little brother. They act alike too. They're both particular about the way things are done. My little cousin has the same boundless energy and imagination my brother had at age two. They both love the water and swim like fish. My little cousin has already begun to decorate his room with helicopters.

My brother, you see, is a pilot who flies fighter jets for a living. He deployed recently. There were moments when I missed him this weekend. I missed two year old him, ten year old him, sixteen year old him, twenty year old him, and present day twenty five year old him, as I made my little cousin into a "sandwich" using our imagination to add fixings like pepper and ketchup and avocado then wrapping him up in a blanket for our tortilla. But thanks to the wonders of genetics I actually got to spend some time with a version of my brother while getting to know someone totally new all at the same time.

There is something comforting about the way genes work out sometimes. They're not all powerful but they're important. Thanks to their funny way of expressing themselves, genes ensure that somewhere someone has a face that can reflect back your grandmother who passed away or your brother who's gone to sea or even reveal bits of you that you forgot you had too.

*I just consulted with a biologist and she corrected my scientific terms. It isn't a Kreb's square it is a Punnett square. It has been a long time since I took biology in high school. Sorry, folks.

The Adoring Masses

2010-08-03T13:54:00.004-04:00

Yesterday, Godbaby, Big Sister, and I went to see some art. We looked at the American landscape. We saw some huge mobiles. We even went all the way up to the roof. But Godbaby slept the whole time. We were actually pretty excited to see the art and we were also sure that it was art that seven-week-old Godbaby could see too. But her eyes were closed. Which was actually okay because it meant that we got to enjoy our visit without a fussy baby.

In the end Godbaby didn't wake up until it was time to receive her adoring public at a nearby tea shop. Once she gets started receiving her public things can sorta snowball out of control. One woman proclaimed that Godbaby was the cutest baby she'd ever seen in her life. Another woman appeared out of nowhere to announce that she wanted to cover Godbaby in kisses. Even other children were mesmerized by her cuteness. At the BART station some small Afro-francophones asked, "One month?" "No," I replied, "almost two months." "Oh!" said the little girls whose baby sister started to shout, " Ba ba! Ba ba!" Apperently the fan club has a youth axillary.

Godbaby then created a traffic jam in a local parking lot on her way to the pharmacy. The cuteness just swelled out of control. No one seemed to mind that she was blocking the entrance to the store. It is clear that Godbaby has super powers. She even got Best Friend to calm down and enjoy the cuteness. Which I think means that I'm President of the fan club now.

Notes on Friends and Appricots

2010-08-01T00:19:00.006-04:00

Rare is the friend who you click with so well that you can go months without seeing her only to pick up where you left off as soon as you see each other again. Rarer still is the friend who you can email two nights before landing in her city asking to crash. To which she answers an excited, "Yes!" and then treats you to exquisite hospitality. Rarest of all-- both of these accompanied by the ability to cook. The innkeeper rocks but the staff she employs is top notch. Last night Best Friend and I were treated to an amazing dinner. The food was so good that I only took pictures of it and not of my gracious hosts, the Newlyweds, or of the rambunctious game of Liebrary we all played after dinner. Oh, and also, this apricot upside down cake.

The Innkeeper

2010-07-30T17:13:00.004-04:00

Dusty, the innkeeper.

I am staying at the most delightful inn right now. The innkeeper is so attentive, warm, and caring. Yesterday she organized a shopping excursion with the inn staff to a local market to select dinner. She then oversaw the preparations of a delicious meal and even invited a nice local guest to join me for dinner. She then guarded the door while we ate. I haven't stayed at a inn this nice since I stayed in L.A. with Fish the feline hotelier.

Outside near the inn the neighborhood is in bloom.

Homecoming

2010-07-28T17:18:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I stood at the top of a hill, goddaughter safely sleeping in her Baby Björn, and the scent eucalyptus sent me back to my childhood for a split second. It was the smell of the park on the way to school for a moment before it became the scent of my goddaughter's neighborhood park. Maybe it was the seven week old asleep on my chest and maybe it was the sun on the roses we passed, but suddenly a neighborhood I'd never been too was more familiar than foreign. I felt a sense of ease and belonging that I lack when I'm "back east."

People spoke to us at the grocery store. Strangers smiled on the street when I made eye contact. A woman who'd just been introduced to three younger sisters she never knew about poured her heart out to a postal worker who encouraged her to get to know her new found family. There were three kinds of avocados at the grocery store.

My best friend just moved here and is in the process of acclimating to his new life. Time and time again he mentions something surprising and different to him about life on the West Coast. And time and time again I think of those same things as somehow normal, preferable, or simply as a marker of home. Now that he is here along with my goddaughter it seems that going home may mean a trip to the Bay for a while yet. On that hill top yesterday the goodness of that new truth finally washed over me.

Movie Review: The Kids Are All Right

2010-07-23T23:52:00.006-04:00

When Brokeback Mountain came out everyone learned a lesson about tolerance. Two cowboys in love? Never. Except maybe. Okay, fine, but it ain't winnin' the Oscar! But Brokeback Mountain was set in another time (the mid-20th century) and in a rural setting...where men are men and women don't think anything of letting them go fishing. But tonight's movie was set in present day Southern California. There, in a two parent home, four family members work through a major transitional season: the eldest child's final summer before going off to college. Oh, and the two middle class parents are both women. They're lesbian moms. Refreshingly, they're out and raising a family. Their major source of conflict comes not from dealing with some sort of "gay shame angst" but from dealing with letting their oldest go and negotiating their family's relationship to their sperm donor.

Pros:
-The family life depicted involves both an immense amount of love and affection alongside real conflict and relationship issues. No, this isn't the perfect propaganda family. They've got issues...because they're human. Not because two lesbians are raising a family.

-The kids do teenage things without suffering heavy handed consequences to teach the audience a lesson.

-The donor dad doesn't save the day.

-The characters experience realistic consequences for their actions.

Cons:
-There is a lot of straight sex for being a movie about gay women...where is their sex scene? I thought the big deal about gay people was that they had sex? So why don't they get to have sex too? It isn't all bubble baths and talking and sharing. Jeez.

-The kids could've been a bit more developed as characters.

-Annette Benning could've worn more sweater vests.

See it if...
You like Focus Features' usual fare and don't need a heavy handed "moral" to make a story satisfying.

Forget it if...
You believe in the importance of a "strong male influence."

Dr. _______, I Presume

2010-07-09T14:43:00.002-04:00

My best friend finished his dissertation, defended it, and became Dr. Best Friend! Then we went out and partied while looking super hot. Congratulations, Dr. Best Friend!

The Tassel was Worth the Hassle: Graduation 2010

2010-06-19T12:49:00.010-04:00

If you'll remember, the last time one of my brothers graduated I posted a celebratory blog post. But this post, while certainly celebratory, seems to have come really fast. It feels like just yesterday I was at Littlest Bro's Tiny Town Pre-School graduation. It was sorta grueling for the little guy...it totally took forever. They played "Pomp and Circumstance", they sang a few songs like the pre-school alma mater, parents were treating it like college graduation, most of the kids were losing it by the end. Littlest Bro only remembers being bored and not having a tissue and using his sleeve instead. For some reason I just thought that he'd be little forever. As you can see from the picture, he's taller than me. In fact, he's been taller than me for a while. I didn't realize by how much until I saw our picture. How did that happen?
Here are some things I'm super proud of about Littlest Bro:

10) He's super handsome.

9) He's really funny. I always end up laughing with him whenever we talk/hang out.

8) He likes to shop as much as I do.

7) He's not afraid to wear purple, peach, or pink.

6) He has more than one pair of shoes made out of hemp.

5) He was the only one of us voted into his yearbook's "Who's Who" as, what else, Best Dressed.

4)He's pretty cool. You never know with younger siblings (there are eight years between us) but he turned out super cool and awesome to hang out with.

3) He has a band. And they sound good. And he knows how to work the crowd. And people show up just to see them.

2) He's creative and talented. (Those two things don't always go together...but he hit the jackpot.)

1) When he was little he lived in his car seat taking me and Middle Bro all over town for our activities. He's apparently forgiven me for this and is becoming one of my best friends.

Here are some more pics from the big day. Littlest Bro, the tassel was worth the hassle, much much much much love!

It takes a baaaaad woman...

2010-06-10T22:57:00.004-04:00

...to be a good godmother. Or, so said Billie Holiday to Rosemary Clooney once. This past week my little bundle of joy, who I'll from now on refer to as Godbaby, came into the world. She's super cute and super awesome and super adorable. Here's a picture to prove it:
See, I told you: cute and awesome. She has a full head of hair, just like I did when I was born. Actually, she sorta looks like baby me. Here's a picture to prove it:Apple, meet tree. I assume this means that I'll be able to transfer my most charming qualities to her: my sense of humor, my ability to tell a story, and my nice hair. Obviously, we've already go the hair covered.

Hello Summer

2010-05-29T20:51:00.002-04:00

Hi Readers,

I've had sort of an interesting spring and am now gearing up for the summer. I'm teaching again, writing my dissertation, getting ready for a trip to California, getting ready for he perils of the academic job market, and hopefully buying a real bike. I spent some time in Virginia. I spent some time wallowing in writers block. I spent some time with my friends. It is admittedly sorta weird not to be headed South for the summer as is usually my pattern but I'm okay with teaching now and adventuring later. Anyway, this is just a post to say stay tuned. The summer is going to be full of good pictures.

-V

Travel Mall

2010-05-15T14:52:00.015-04:00

You know how when you ride on an airplane you get that catalog called SkyMall? Well it's not just for the friendly skies anymore. That's right, readers, the company has a version for overland modes of travel called, Travel Mall. Being the awesome Ms. V that I am I decided to peruse the catalog for you and pick out some items that you might be interested in, you know, just cuz.

Item No. 10
A Green Lawn Care Container Set
Ever want to make your yard look as Green as possible while celebrating your love of the whole world? Well then this collection of drab lawn care items is for you. Don't worry, all the items match for maximum effect. Everything, and I mean everything, is shaped like a globe.Item No. 9
Panoramic Wall Art
I'm not trying to bust anybody but doesn't this wall "art" look reminiscent of the stock desk top photos that come with your computer? Item No. 8
The Telekinetic Obstacle Course
Yes, you read that correctly. I have no idea how you control a game of Mouse Trap with your mind. From the picture it looks like you have to stare a lot and be a cyborg. So, if you can do both of those things, order away for hours of fun.

Item No. 7
The Car Desk
It is hard to be a woman on the go in the corporate world. It is also hard to conduct business from a desk in your car when your car is a convertible. Wait, this isn't for use while driving (see add text in bright red)? Then forget it, I'm not ordering one.Item No. 6
The "Freedom's Pride" Life Sized Bald Eagle Wall Sculpture There is nothing like a bald eagle with talons ready leaping off your office wall to add a little bit of American pride to your work area. Go ahead, share the pride. If you buy more than one then they're only $86 each!

Item No. 5
A Sarcophagus
Forget the eagle, go for the sarcophagus. It is more than eight feet tall, has fourteen shelves inside, and needs to be mounted to the wall to keep from crushing you under the weight of its awesomeness.

Item No. 4
A Personal Air Conditioner Hat
This company claims to offer a hat that, once soaked in water, uses cooling crystals to keep you from overheating. I feel like the model's face has the look of, "yeah, I know this shit doesn't work but a job's a job."
Item No. 3
A Magic Showerhead
No, it isn't what you're thinking (don't be nasty!) It is a showerhead that lights up and makes the water look like it is different colors. Something about lights near water just seems really dangerous but I guess that's what makes it magic.
Item No. 2
Shoes with a Questionable Logo on Them
Okay, I know it is a good idea to buy a sturdy shoe with the kind of support your foot needs but does this company have to have a logo that looks like...um...well, just look at it! Also, that businessman has fire coming from the bottom of his shoes. That just doesn't seem safe.

Item No. 1
Cat Toilet Training Kit
Look at this cat's face. Does that look like the face of a happy cat or a cat who desperately wishes it could poop in some sand like a normal feline?

Feliz Cinco de Mayo!

2010-05-06T12:43:00.004-04:00

Things Ms. Foxy and I learned while walking around the City yesterday:

1. Rompers are here and they're coming to take over NYC any day now.

2. We both look "mixed." Though she's apperently African American and I'm East Asian. (Not to worry, we cleared things up with the guy who asked. See culturally accurate portraits below.)

3. Sometimes a Facebook status is the difference between lonely wandering around Brooklyn and a lovely spring day of shopping, drinking a sangria/margarita, and laughing at the emperor who, p.s., is totally nekkid!

Fresh New Look

2010-04-29T13:55:00.004-04:00

It is springtime, dear readers! Hence the new fresh spring look of my blog. Things were getting a little drab and dreary with all that black in the old template. Here's hoping my photos still look okay against a white background. Also, check me out over at Foxy by Nature snarking about spring "fashions."

Sausagefest: The Dachshund Spring Fiesta!

2010-04-27T16:32:00.005-04:00

It is no secret, I'm a fan of little sausage dogs, i.e. dachshunds. Pronounced: daks-hund, the little weenies were originally bred in Germany (hence the hund part of their name) to hunt badger, rabbit, and other types of burrowing game. Today, they're bred to be our little sausagie companions. The members of the Dachshund Friendship Club of NYC really seem to get this about the little dogs. They host two gatherings a year where the doggies and their humans can socialize and just have a good time. No competition. No pressure. Just fun.This year my mom and I finally made it. Mom adopted a senior dachshund named Maggie a couple of years ago. She died earlier this year at the ripe old age of 14-16 (we're not sure). So, in her memory, we went to see her kin folk in Washington Square Park. It turned out to be a great day and, of course, made me want one of my own.
To see more pics of the dogs and their cute costumes: click here.

A Bloggtastic Event

2010-04-05T11:56:00.003-04:00

Image by mikebaird via Flickr

Something very exciting is afoot over at Foxy by Nature: I'm going to be doing some joint posts with my super awesome friend, Ms. Foxy! We are going to put our minds together to comment on some things we've noticed about this world in which we live. So, head on over to her blog and be on the look out for letters to Ms. Foxy from yours truly!

...Unless You're Ready for Some Snakes to Jump Out: Some Thoughts About Geneogoly TV Shows, Part 2

2010-04-02T15:28:00.003-04:00

I was critical of the politics of genealogy in my last post. Since then I've watched three more episodes of NBC's "Who Do You Think You Are?": Emmit Smith, Lisa Kudrow, and Mathew Broderick. Kudrow's episode really got to me. Emmit Smith's narrative, which ended in Virginia, was one I knew well and probably could've guessed at knowing the history of American slavery pretty well. It was a bit taken aback when Smith seemed to be totally surprised that he had some white ancestry. I was really moved by Kudrow's journey to what is now Belarus but was part of Poland during WWII when her relatives lived and were murdered there by invading Nazis. In the clip below Kudrow pays her respects to the mass grave in which Nazis discarded her great-grandmother's remains.

Watching this, and many other moments in Kudrow's journey into her family's history, reminded me of similar experiences I've had while conducting reserach. Watching the grief of her great-grandmother's neighbor as she recounted what happened to her villages Jewish community griped me. I began to consider genealogy's more positive mission of remembrance. Had Kudrow not traveled the distance she had to recover her grandmother's final resting place, and to find a long lost cousin, a whole branch of her family and the act of remembering them would be impossible. Similarly, in Emmit Smith's ancestor Mariah, a mulatto woman from Virginia, would have remained lost to Smith's family had he not found her in her owner's correspondence. And while Mathew Broderick is not the descendant of enslaved people or Holocaust victims, he wept at his ancestor's grave near Atlanta. A soldier in the union army, Broderick's ancestor rested in an unmarked grave until his inquiries resulted in locating and marking the unknown soldier's resting place. Suddenly, a man not even known to his contemporaries was known to his descendants and the Veteran's Administration's record books.

None of the celebrities in these episodes were looking to "claim" anything. Smith wasn't trying to prove his Americaness, though he does take a trip to Africa to confront the reality of contemporary human trafficking. Kudrow wasn't trying to claim the Holocaust nor was Broderick looking to claim WWI or the American Civil War. All of them wanted to be able to remember people who were silences in their family's memory. They wanted to honor and remember not claim a past to use as social capital. For these three there were snakes in the bushes, so to speak. What jumped out at them were harrowing stories of battlefield violence, the atrocity of genocide, and the often confusing always horrific reality of the chattel principle. And they remembered.

Don't Go Scratchin' 'Round the Bushes: Some Thoughts About Geneogoly TV Shows, Part 1

2010-03-16T13:42:00.003-04:00

A close friend introduced me to the Southern American colloquial saying, "Don't go scratchin' 'round the bushes unless you're ready for some snakes to jump out." This saying has resonance in a number of situations: a friend's medicine cabinet, your parent's dresser drawers, a boyfriend's/girlfriend's cell phone, for example. Two recent television series have caused me to wonder if the same is true for the American past and your family's part in it?

I study one of the most brutal regions of the United States during one of the most painful periods in American History: the antebellum American South. Even though my work focuses on the strategies that African Americans employed to resist and rebel against enslavement, the stories I uncover in the archive rarely have happy endings. As a result of making this my life's work I'm a bit hesitant to look into my own family's history. Being that I come from immigrants and slaves, there is some difficulty in tracing family lines beyond about 1865. Even so, I'm sure that my paternal grandfather's line is well documented and that were I to scratch around North Carolina's state archives I'd uncover a wealth of family information. But I think what makes me the most hesitant to conduct some "me-search" in between cycles of reserach is the history that the project of genealogy has in my understanding of the practice.

In the clip above you find a number of celebrities marveling at what professional genealogists were able to find out about their pasts. There is a sense of awe that comes from finding one's ancestors in the archive. I've sat next to more than one genealogist at the Library of Virginia who, having finally found someone they'd been searching for, shouted "I've found them!" The celebrities in a number of TV series (African American Lives, Faces of America, Who Do You Think You Are?) seem to have similar reactions. While I should really be supportive of anything that gets people excited about American History, I'm still uneasy with some of the components of the project of genealogy.

Embedded in the histories of various Virginia Historical associations, the archive I'm most familiar with, the practice of meticulously recording the family lines of Virginia families cannot be extracted from the context of the extremely racialized society that produced such documents. During the 19th and for most of the 20th century, being white meant access to concrete legally sanctioned social, economic, and civil privileges that non-whites did not have access to. Even in the state of Virginia, often lauded as a "moderate" Southern state, slavery and Jim Crow were the law of the land, respectively. Given this historical context it makes sense that prominent Virginia historian Annette Gordon Reed, known best for her work on the Hemmings and Jefferson families, would refer to white Virginian's obsession with genealogy as a particular project of whiteness. That is, tracing one's family line often involves discovering/proving just how white one is. In a place like Virginia where the legacy of racism, slavery and Jim Crow have inspired white anxiety about the obvious progeny of interracial sex for generations and influenced some of its mixed raced population to "pass" for white, embarking on a genealogical journey can result in some surprises.

Projects of geology presently have the capability to flatten an individual's relationship to the past. For example, it is easy for Sara Jessica Parker to get swept away by the romance and the drama of her Puritan ancestor's unlikely escape from a Salem, MA, witch tribunal. She can even be awed by the discovery that an ansestory rushed to California in search of Gold in 1849. However, both the story of Puritan Massachusetts and Gold Rush Era California do more than link the actor to the romantic story of America's origins. They link her to brutal sites of imperial conquest. Does it make SJP a bad person for being intrigued by her family's connection to some of America's oldest European families? No, of course not. Both of those stories are interesting and surprising for someone who began the journey thinking she couldn't trace past the immigrant communities of Cincinnati. It's just that there is more to the story. I'm sure her German immigrant ancestors have some similarly complicated histories. After all, their immigrant community was populated by those who came to work in America's factories long before labor laws, in a city with sizable white ethnic enclaves, and a long standing African American population. But Ms. Parker ends her episode smiling about how "American" she is as a result of finding some long resident family lines in her genealogy. Whether she's cognizant of it or not, her new sense of "Americaness" is influenced by and reifies for the audience the assumption that "real Americans" are the WASPs that settled New England. This contradicts the complex nature of her story that is presented throughout the episode. In fact, her story demonstrates that to claim America means to claim a complicated past and not just postcard pictures of dramatic moments.

This is true for my own genealogy. The land that my grandfather grew up on, land purchased by the son of a former slave, was once occupied by Native Americans. And so, my family too benefited from the same imperial conquest that kept them in chains until 1865. See, history is complicated. History is about webs and not lines. Reducing one's relationship to the past into a line obscures the stories that one is connected to outside of demonstrable kin. Certainly the present controversy about the linked history and bloodlines of the Jefferson and Hemmings families demonstrates just what genealogy obscures-- in fact was invented to obscure.

Coming in installment number two: A round up/review of all the series and an analysis of their content...including the genetic testing portion of each series.

Things that Kids Pobably Don't Learn Anymore: Writing a Business Letter

2010-03-08T13:24:00.002-05:00

Image by x-ray delta one via Flickr

Today my Boss Lady (aka Ms. Cheese) asked me a question about writing a formal business letter: Where does the date go? I immediately flashed back to my school days during which I learned to write a letter more than once. In fact, I took an old school business, i.e. typing class, in high school that involved not only learning to type but also how to type "business" documents: a memo, a letter, etc. Though it wasn't all that long ago, no one used email as religiously back then and texting wasn't really affordable, nor were cell phones for that matter. We learned letter formats because people still used them to conduct business. I turns out that while typing is part of my everyday life and proved to be an invaluable skill in college and now grad school, I haven't had to write many formal letters. I type everyday. I've written maybe five informal cards over the past twelve months. None of those required a format so much as some sort of witty greeting my signature. Do people write business letters anymore? Here at History Journal most of our work is done online. Most of our mail comes to our in-box and not to our mailbox. I wonder if kids even have to learn how to write letters anymore?

For those who are wondering the format (which I remembered correctly) is as follows:

Your Address
Date
Recipient's Address
Salutation
Body of Letter
"Sincerely"
Signature
Your Initials
Enclosures
CC:

Babies: A Nice Way to Start People

2010-03-06T11:44:00.003-05:00

I've got babies babies babies on the way! Well, okay, I don't have babies on the way but quite a few friends do. Add these latest babies to the babies I already have in my life and I've got a baby baseball team or a baby basketball roster or a baby synchronized swimming team. Now that my sister is having a baby I've jumped into the baby excitement like never before. I mean, I like babies and they like me but I've never been this excited before. When my cousins had kids I was really happy. It was cool to see who they looked like and, let's face it, my cousin's little daughter has serious fashion sense (see picture above). I love my little niece and nephews. I was excited to get them little gifts and to hang out with them when I visited a couple of years ago.

I think my latest enthusiasm for my sister's little one comes from the fact that she and her huzbin call the baby by my name. That's right, there is a lil' V in my sisters tummy! I have no idea what names they've actually thought of giving the little one but getting updates about lil' V all the time has sent my excitement, and shopping impulse, through the roof. So, there you have it, if you want V to get stuff for you kid, name said kid after V.

Today in WTF: Vampires Need to Stop

2010-03-03T10:54:00.003-05:00

I'm not sure why people suddenly like vampires. Personally, I think the whole vampire fad is ridiculous and dumb.Maybe it is because I'm not into extended virginity/abstinence metaphors. Maybe it is because I don't think living without sunlight is sexy. Maybe I just don't care to be bitten on the neck by a dude. Whatever. The moral of the story is that vampires need to stop. Go back into your coffins, vampires, and leave pop culture alone for a while. And don't think this is your big chance, werewolves. I'm talking to you too, mummies and zombies. Just stop it. You too, Frankenstein!

Ye Olde History Towne

2010-02-21T20:05:00.006-05:00

Image by crazysanman.history via Flickr

Most people encounter history every day--they just fail to notice traces and shadows of the past. Some people take note of historical markers when they happen to stop at a light that allows them to read one. There is a whole channel on cable dedicated to history and even one dedicated to biography. Though I suspect that most people only think about history when they're forced to in a classroom or on some family vacation/field trip to a historic sight or living history attraction.

A friend recently went to a local historical village...on a date. Now, as a history nerd myself I can't really fault the friend for thinking this might actually work out as a good date destination. Not every date can be bungee jumping into a hot tub or horseback riding on a roller coaster, or a five star chef cooking you dinner in a helicopter while you fly through a volcano. Sometimes you just have to pick a mutual interest with someone and see how it goes. Their date was not a winner. But, as I told her, I have to give her credit for trying it. If someone had asked me on a date to the 1600s (i.e. Slavery Times), I'd have said no right away.

The local historical village got me to thinking: why do we have Ye Olde History Towne? I guess it was cool to see a blacksmith's shop and a potters wheel as a kid. But what is actually learned and relearned through living history villages? There are some things trained actors can't reenact because those nuances of the past are super problematic in the present. Things like slavery and infant mortality rates and sexism don't play well to the summer vacation crowd. From what I saw at Colonial Williamsburg this summer, summer vacationers would rather play Continental Soldier and buy Felicity paraphernalia than think about the institution of slavery. This is understandable. Most of the people who come to the famous living history park are under fourteen. To the attraction's credit, Colonial Williamsburg has done a lot to try to represent African American history in a respectful and educational way. They also leave the horseshit in the road. So, that's an authentic touch in the July heat. Some sites are better than others at getting visitors to critically engage with the past.

In contrast to the American living history park I give you this story from my friend from across the pond(aka, British Buddy):
Man I wish I lived in the US - the closest we get to Ye Olde Towne is this historical centre that replicates the experience of being an evacuee during World War II for primary school children (I think thats Grade School in the US? or First School? or Junior High?...). So I went with the rest of my class when we were all about 8 years old, you have to dress up in 1940s clothes, you stand on a train station (as if you have just been evacuated from London) and then random actors come along and pick which children they want to take home (which is humiliating), and then you spend the day doing chores for them and being fed 1940s food like spam sandwiches - Good times!

I guess it is a good thing we like our over here history clean, patriotic, and romanticized. I'm all about challenging the dominant view of American History. But I have to admit that I'd hate to go to a historical village only to find myself transported, like Oprah, to the 1600s.

Oprah Visits Colonial House from jefflin on Vimeo.

Super Friends and Underpants Gnomes

2010-02-18T18:09:00.008-05:00

Image by roadkillbuddha via Flickr

So, remember when I likened my dissertation committee to the Justice League? No? Okay, well fine, in short putting a dissertation committee together is like assembling an extraordinary league of scholars...a justice league of super heroes. It's true. They band together and swoop in with their unique talents and super powers to help your dissertation in its hour of need. But just as in any good super hero narrative, they don't show up right away. The damsel has to get herself tied to the railroad tracks, for example, before they save her at the last possible second. The damsel, in other words, has to sweat it out. Guess who the damsel is in this hackneyed analogy?

Recently, at a meeting with the Superman and Batman of my dissertation, I discovered that there is another model for dissertation advisers or, more accurately, their advice. It turns out that no one can write your dissertation but you. I know, right? This disappointing fact has to be learned and relearned as you slog through your sources and and try to write something to hand to your committee. It is the slogging that they can't really help you with at all. You have to figure out what slogging looks like to you. The Super Friends only want to see your final product (or a draft there of) and not to hear your whining about thinking about maybe possibly writing something, anything, to hand to them. Enter the Underpants Gnomes:

The Underpants Gnomes' business model is analogous to earning a PhD. See if you can follow along:

Step 1: Reserach

Step 2: _________.

Step 3: PhD

See, wasn't that easy to follow? It is that simple. I've had the whole process explained to me this way many many times. No one spoke of methods or secondary reading or working with data. Nope. Let's review the formula, shall we. This time try to guess which step my dissertation is at currently. So again, that's: Step 1: Research. Step 2:________. Step 3: PhD!

Tough Cookies

2010-02-15T14:25:00.004-05:00

Like many students I rely on some sort of school provided health care. This means that the medical group that I visit for my checkups, exams, and such is a teaching medical group. Sometimes I see "real" doctors and sometimes I see people who've just finished medical school. The med students are almost always nervous to see me. They stumble through the exam and don't really exude the "I'm a doctor who knows what she/he is talking about...here take these nice pills and feel better," sort of energy. Sometimes they're thrown off that I'm a person of color. They talk to me like I'm a child and explain things in a loud clear voice. Sometimes they register visible surprise when I answer the usual menstrual cycle related questions: When was your last cycle? I'm not sure; What kind of birth control do you use? None; Um...I'm a lesbian. The whole getting pregnant thing isn't an issue. (Cue awkward silence as physician fills out computer chart, clears throat, and regains composure.) This has never been the case with experienced medical personnel. The nurses, physicians assistants, medical assistants, and, for that matter, the receptionists, have seen it all. Nothing shocks them. In fact, they, usually ask me what I'm studying and wish me luck on the whole PhD thing.

Image by magandafille via Flickr

Today, after a night of coughing and a weekend of sniffles, I made an appointment. My symptoms were so straightforward that Dr. Google could've diagnosed me. But the last time I felt this sick I tried to wait it out and ended up battling bronchitis for a month. I thought of just taking the Robitussin in my medicine cabinet and going back to my little office to work. But my boss was nice enough to let me work from home, so I decided I should just try to see someone. Besides, everyone knows that if you want nice meds to make you feel better, you have to go to the doctor.

I had no such luck. I saw a young doctor who spent a lot of time feeling my face, which was weird because I don't think I have sinuses in some of the places she was rubbing. Then she disappeared for a while. I guess she was talking to someone about my hacking. I waited. Then I waited some more and may or may not have fallen asleep. I thought maybe she'd forgotten about me but then she came back with a script in hand. I thought, "this is it...killer meds that will make me feel like leaping over a tall building or writing a dissertation or something." Again, no such luck. My acute bronchitis is viral, for now anyway. No horse pills...just Robitussin and fluids and rest. Also, it will take about four weeks to go away. And also, it will get worse before it gets better. Thanks, Doc. Next time maybe you could just leave a message on my voice mail that shortens that down to a swift, "Tough cookies. Suck it up, Princess." Okay, it isn't her fault that I have a virus, but really how long does it take to ascertain that I'm hacking up a lung? Did she really have to give me a back rub to check my sinuses? Is it odd that she rubbed my arm during a coughing fit?

Now, I don't have a serious health problem. My bronchitis will go away at some point. As long as I don't take deep breaths I should be able to keep writing and working. But I have loved ones who do have to see doctors regularly. Some of them have mystery ailments that mean multiple visits to specialists. How the heck do they deal with this lack of bedside manner? Do doctors really have to talk to patients like they're stupid? Is there some point in a doctor's tenure that she morphs into one of the cool older doctors I've seen on occasion? When the name on the chart reads Dr. V, will I get different treatment? I'm not going to get my MD...but I'm right that there aren't any sinuses in my back, right?

The Winter Olympics

2010-02-13T12:08:00.003-05:00

Image by Nationaal Archief via Flickr

It's that time again, time for the Winter Olympic Games. There are many things about the Olympics that I really like: competition, rooting for underdog nations, dreaming about being an Olympian. I was raised in a Summer Games family. Track and Field got the whole family to stop and gather around the TV. But the Winter Games were always less of a draw. I'm from the Golden State, after all. I come from people who love the heat of summer and dread snow. To be honest, most of what goes on at the Winter Olympics perplexes me. Nordic Skiing, I get that. It makes total sense that at some point people from snowy Scandinavia had to ski to get around. The Biathlon, those same Scandinavians had to hunt somehow during the long cold dark winter. Speed Skating--how else were the Dutch going to get around when the canals froze? But who came up with the skeleton, for example? Or how about the freakin' ski jump? So much about the Winter Games is super dangerous. I tried to think up dangerous sports in the Summer Games...diving injury? Javelin mishap? I suppose Usain Bolt could run so fast that he might evaporate...but other than that the Summer Games don't seem nearly as dangerous as the Winter Games. Unfortunately, the Games have already been marred by the untimely death of one athlete. I just hope that these newer, techier, more "extreme" games will not be characterized by similar tragedy.

Laissez les bon temps rouler!

2010-02-08T13:24:00.003-05:00

Image via Wikipedia

Unless you were living in a cave or in total denial, Super Bowl Sunday was super exciting yesterday. The New Orleans Saints won. This is, of course, super great because the Saints, known as the "Ain'ts" for a long time, have never won before. Also, New Orleans could use some good press and some revenue from a winning team. Considering that their stadium, the super dome, has become another name for national shame following the mismanaged recover from Hurricane Katrina, this is super positive for the Big Easy. To top it all off, the game was a good game. Both teams really had to play. It wasn't a blow out. It was a good ol' fashioned game of football. It didn't decisively go to the Saints until well into the fourth quarter. The whole thing was, well, super!

Usually, I don't really watch the game to watch the game so much as the commercials. Who can forget the 2006 classic,"Wazzzup?!" or the Thriller Dancing Lizards from last year? Ever since Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction ruined half time forever, the commercials seemed to be the only consistent source of entertainment. This year started out slow. I got my hopes up after seeing this commercial featuring Betty White:

Then things got ridiculous. And by ridiculous I mean, misogynist. Some guy traded his wife for some tires. Then Dove let us all know that real men don't use Dove body wash--they use Man Dove body wash. Of course, this one took the masculinity in crisis cake:

Even stuffed animals got in on the man/child extravaganza:

This one was, admittedly, also on the man/child bandwagon. But it is kinda funny:

Is life really that aweful for men on Super Bowl Sunday? Do the organizers/advertiseres really think women aren't a)football fans and/or b) watching the Super Bowl? Does it make sense, as someone on another blog pointed out, that there was no gay dating site add but, rather, a bunch of adds about how horrible men's lives are with women around? Well, the underdog team won for a city that is still reeling from a natural disaster--I guess you can't have everything.

You Spin Me Right 'Round, Baby, Right 'Round...

2010-02-02T20:08:00.004-05:00

I've decided that 2010 is going to be fit and sexy. I'm taking a yoga class.

Image by dalydose via Flickr

I'm taking two spin classes and, I promise, I'm going to eat in more. As part of this new fit and sexy campaign Ms. Cheese asked if she could join a spin class too. I told her that spinning would be hard but totally worth it. So, she joined.

We were totally excited to start our class. We went out and got Ms. Cheese new workout duds. We went over how to pace yourself during the work out. But nothing could've prepared us for that first class.

At first, things went well. The instructor went around adjusting everyone's bike. She explained how each bike works and eased us into the work out with a nice warm up. Our instructor was firm but compassionate. She made sure to ask us if we were all doing okay and reminded us to pace ourselves and to know our limits. Unfortunately, not everyone took heed.

First, a girl in the front row began to look a little peaked. Even though the instructor was attentive and encouraged her to slow down and then to get off of her bike, the girl decided to push it just a little bit more. When she finally got up to rest, she went over like a sapling in the forest. Face plant. Chin busted open. Out cold. Instead of sending the room into panic most participants just kept pedaling while the girls friend and the class instructor went to her aide.

Then, as we were all stretching out and moving out of the way of the emergency workers, another particpant stood up in the back of the room and began to yarf all over the back of the classroom. That's right, yarf. It was like being transported into a sitcom. Rediculous.

Of course, I was worried that Ms. Cheese would never want to return to the class again. But she was totally fine. She'd paced herself and she'd eaten that day. So, I have faith that she'll continue to return. No word on Yarfy McYarfsalot or the poor girl who passed out. Hopefully they're both okay.

We Goin' Party Like It's Ya Birfday

2010-02-01T21:18:00.005-05:00

So many of you may not know this but Ms. Cheese has an alter ego. Her name is Baby Tigers. While Ms. Cheese is studious, thoughtful, and quiet. Baby Tigers is a trash tv watchin, booty shakin', loud laughin' mamajama. In short, Baby Tigers is the pop star to Ms. Cheese's rock star. Anyway, Ms.Cheese had a birthday but, of course, we all knew that Baby Tigers was who would be showing up. So, here it is, an original creation by Ms. Cakes (our resident cake decoratrix).

See, I told you, Tigers is wild and crazy!

You'll note that this cake is approximately the size of an actual baby tiger.

One More Movie

2010-01-22T20:54:00.002-05:00

When I saw the trailer for this movie, I thought it was going to be a stupid stupid movie.

The Book of Eli looked like another stupid movie about the apocalypse. The trailer has all of the tell tale ingredients: a wasteland landscape, people who've given way to despair, and a hero on a mission. I expected that, given the movie's surprising lack of Tina Turner with a Mohawk, I'd be totally underwhelmed by the movie.

The movie turned out to be pretty good. I'd like to attribute the movie's goodness to two factors:

1) I saw the movie at a Black movie theater. That is, I saw the movie in Brooklyn at a theater who's clientele is mostly Black. Now, V's Photo Blog does not endorse stereotyping. It is a well known stereotype that Black people talk through movies. But, as a Black person, I can pretty much confirm that we do actually talk through movies. The running cometary that was inspired by Denzel Washington (the last Black man in the world) trekking along on a mission to save the world was priceless.

2) It turns out that, despite the action scenes featured in the trailer, the movie actually has a deeper theme than "hero kicks ass at the end of the world." Denzel Washington can seriously act. And, he actually gets to do so in this movie. Also, Jennifer Beales shows up and acts as well.

The Verdict: B+; despite the lack of Tina Turner, this movie manages to be entertaining and good for post-movie conversation.

A Note on Reserch: Sometimes You Forget What You Found

2010-01-22T20:43:00.004-05:00

This week in dissertation land I processed like 300 photos of documents. That is no joke, people. I labeled and cataloged 300 photos of things I'd taken pictures of during my reserach trip last summer. The fun thing about this was discovering that I'd actually found a whole bunch of stuff I totally forgot about. For example, I took pictures of a wax seal from the 1790s, a seal that still stands for the Virginia county that I study. I forgot about the folders of Free Person of Color Records I'd photographed. I can't post pictures of my research because I signed an agreement with both of my archives not to publish photos of documents that they own the rights to. I realize that this could make for a boring post. But I was excited and happy to find out that I just might have enough for a dissertation.

Movies Movies Movies

2010-01-15T12:54:00.005-05:00

After writing about the Blue Alien Movie I thought it would be nice to review a few other movies I've seen over my winter break. I actually took a break this December/January. I've slept, read novels for fun, and gone to the movies. I've also thought a little about my dissertation and read some secondary literature. But compared to last year's race to finish my dissertation proposal, this winter has been a glamorous vacation. I don't usually go to the movies that much because they're so expensive but there is a movie theater right around the corner from Sammy's house. While Sammy is a wonderful dog, he's not much of a conversationalist. Scratching his belly is only entertaining for so long. So, on nights when I didn't have some other glamorous place to be I went to the movies and it was more hit than miss.

Nine

This movie is about an Italian movie maker in the 1950s/60s. He's handsome and cheats on his wife and is having some sort of creative crisis. But, what is really important is that this movie features Penelope Cruz dancing in lingerie. She plays the main character's mistress and, for about five to seven min of movie making gold, she sings and shimmies her way into his hideout away from the bustle of Rome. The movie is really about the director's relationships with women, both friends and lovers. From his momma to his wife to his muse, this man has some serious women to contend with.

The Verdict: B-; it can wait for Netflix.
As musicals go, it isn't the sort of thing you leave the theater singing. The dance isn't amazingly dazzling. The costumes were fly and hip. Oh, and Sophia Loren adds some sizzle as the director's mother. But its no Sound of Music/Westside Story/Dream Girls.

A Single Man

I wasn't really sure what to expect when I went to this one. The trailer (click above) doesn't really tell you much. I knew the basic plot: A gay university professor contemplates suicide in the wake of his partner's sudden death. I had no idea the movie would be so beautiful. The acting is superb. Julianne Moore plays a delightful "fruit fly" with a bouffant to die for and Colin Firth's manages to convey the range of emotion that is grief in ways both subtle and overt. Stylistically the movie is a bit more brainy and allegorical. Most refreshingly, the movie manages not to be yet another in the long line of "gay tragedies". One gets the feeling that the director is telling a human story as opposed to a "gay" story. There is something refreshing about seeing gay love and affection being portrayed with the same sentimentality as heterosexual love.

The Verdic: A; Netflix it, rent it, or go and see it

The Young Victoria

If you know anything about Queen Victoria or Victorian England or Imperialism, this movie might be a little frustrating for you. If you like pretty dresses and gorgeous sets/scenery and nice heterosexual romance, then this movie is going to be totally satisfying. I am somewhere in the middle of these two descriptions. I know a little about Queen Victoria. I know what Charles Dickens had to say about Victorian England and, if I remember correctly, Victoria was kinda the Queen of Everything, hence the nostalgia for her reign. So, if you're willing to yell, "Opium Wars, Conquest of Africa, and poverty of the Industrial Revolution be damned! Victoria and Albert sure do make a good couple," then you're in for a treat. I have to be able to take off my historian hat sometimes and just look at pretty things (see blue alien movie review). Sometimes I just want to see pretty dresses.

The movie is mostly concerned with Victoria's early family drama and her courtship and marriage to Prince Albert, a German nobleman. Ms. Cheese observed that the movie does a really good job of illustrating the Aristocracy's world view. As she put it, "their whole political geography was defined by family connections." Also, Albert and Victoria really liked and loved each other. This was rare in a time of political marriages. Oh and everyone, from the street paupers to the Queen, looks amazing in their costumes. The frocks were to die for. The men's vests were embroidered within an inch of their lives. Who cares about the price of opium in China when there is a ball to dance at?

The Verdict: B; waiting for Netflix might be the most convenient. Ms. Cheese and I had a bloody hard time finding a place to see the blasted moving picture near where we live.

Sometimes I Just Want to Watch Blue Aliens...

2010-01-10T11:24:00.010-05:00

Last weekend I had a close encounter of the third kind...with a tall skinny hipster from Brooklyn. On his planet it is totally okay to turn to any brown person you encounter and ask them for a critical race analysis of every and anything. Apparently, knowing the term "critical race analysis" gives you carte blanche on his planet to put people you don't know on the spot. As in, "So, I guess you have a critical race analysis of Avatar." Now, to my credit, I responded by saying that I'd heard mixed reviews but hadn't seen the latest from James Cameron, creator of The Terminator, The Abyss, and Titanic. My brother and father, for example, called the movie, "Cool, the best action picture money can buy," and, "A trip," receptively. While a colleague said she'd heard that Avatar was analogous to The Birth of A Nation, technically advanced but a hot mess of racism. I told the hipster that I assumed the movie was somewhere in between those two reviews: a fantasy about colonialism with some very cool digital effects. But having not seen it, I didn't really have an opinion nor was I invested in Avatar being racist or not racist. I told him that, when it came down to it, I didn't care about movies about blue aliens. He tried to argue with me. He furrowed his brow and told me I didn't understand the movie. I replied that he was correct (which is a good way to defuse an argument), how could I understand a movie I hadn't seen and didn't really care about? Hipness--Fail. Making the score: V=1 and Hipster = 0. So, there.

Unfortunately, the blue alien movie stayed on my mind after that conversation/argument/weirdness. What if Avatar was The Birth of a Nation reincarnate? What if it was just kinda cool and about blue aliens and not super racist? What if I was bored last night and wanted something to do that didn't require thinking? What if, every once in a while, sometimes I just want to watch blue aliens?

I took Sammy for a walk and swung by to get my ticket at the local theater. The blue aliens and I got off to a rough start. It turns out that, because the movie is in 3D, the ticket price is even higher than the already high NYC movie ticket prices. I had to shovel over $15.75 (that's Earth dollars, people.) So, already I was of the mind that if the 3D glasses didn't cause my seat to blast off and transport me to another world, I would review the movie poorly. I stuck with it though and dropped Sammy at home. I grabbed a burger to sustain me through the movie. The blue aliens run around for 165min so fortifying your tummy is a must. The theater was packed with people all eager to try on the nerdy 3D glasses (see picture.)

Here are the three things you need to know about the blue alien movie:

3. The 3D glasses might make you want to yarf all over the theater. True story.
They give you a few previews of movies that will be in 3D in the near future to help your eyes get acclimated. Seriously, it took my eyes 20min to adjust. I wanted to puke as spaceships whizzed by and stuff jumped out of the screen. Also, when it was time to take the glasses off and use my eyes in the real world (which, p. s., exists in three actual dimensions) I wanted to yarf again for 30 min.

2. The movie is best described as "Dances with Fern Gully" and not The Birth of a Nation 2.
Sure it is a fantasy about colonialism/imperialism. The humans are mostly bad. The Na'vi(blue aliens) are all good and connected quite literally to the forest and the trees. The movie is more pro-environment and anti-war/colonialism than it is "the white man's burden". Spoiler alert: the white guy who becomes one of the Na'vi doesn't save the day in the end. Someone else is the hero.

1. There are some really breathtaking moments in the movie thanks to the advanced digital effects.
The world the Na'vi live in is beautiful and very imaginative. It is totally entertaining to discover the planet with floating mountains and six legged horse like creatures. At night, the whole place is iridescent.

The verdict: The movie may or may not be racist. I don't think so, but you might. Its plot is predictable sci-fi. Its effects are top of the line. There are some strong female characters and plenty of people of color. The Na'vi have some very progressive gender politics and don't appear to have race as a category. The main character is physically disabled and yet uniquely able throughout the movie in ways that physically able characters are not. If it is meant to be an allegory about some colonial situation, it isn't a very good one. The Birth of a Nation was totally intentional. From the black face to the KKK to the white people saving the South, the movie was intentional. In my judgment, the blue alien movie is intentionally environmentalist and anti-war/neo-imperialism. The outsiders don't save the day, the Na'vi save themselves. If anything, the situation is Shaka Zulu and not Wounded Knee. So, go see it if you want to do something entertaining and not think for 165min. Be ready for the nausia of the 3D glasses and have a good time.

Concrete Jungle

2010-01-09T10:48:00.003-05:00

Image via Wikipedia

For the past week I've been in NYC watching a professor's dog. Some of you may remember Sammy. His hair is shorter than in the video but he's still charming and a little bit smelly. The thing is, I'm both resistant to city life and enamored with it. I like walking around the corner to a cafe, sitting in the shadow of the Empire State Building, and typing up a blog entry. But life in NYC isn't all blogging and going out with your friends to quirky "lecture series" , and being fabulous. I mean, aside from having to move, and all of the rediculousness that that means, I'd have to live here. Which wouldn't be so bad with all the art and life and convenience. But what about the old lady that yelled at me in Starbucks the other day or the smell of the street or the fact that money evaporates?

Every winter I get tired of living where I live and I start to dream up a life in NYC for myself. In the dream I have a decent apartment somewhere in Harlem or the Heights. I go to a study carol every morning at 9am to dilligently write my brilliant dissertation. I have a snack at noon. I go to the gym at 4pm to beat the rush. I take a gym shower, eat a Cliff Bar, and whisk off to some lecture/talk or other. I have dinner with a smart friend or two. I go home and blog about my amazing life. I fall to sleep listening to the street hum outside my window. In this vision of my amazing life I have no bills and no laundry and no crazy roommate. There are no hipsters and no angry ladies at the Starbucks.

Maybe I'll just continue to live in not NYC and hope to come back as Sammy in my next life.

Resolution: Copy Ms. Cheese and Blog

2010-01-08T13:59:00.003-05:00

Hello, 2010! I am in the process of copying the esteemed Ms. Cheese, of Cheese Quest fame, and restarting my blogging engines. So much has happend since Thanksgiving. For example, I attended the hot gay mess that was the Out Music Awards (where the picture above was taken). No word yet on what, exactly, makes sea monsters gay, but the whole thing was an adventure nonetheless. Anyway, it is about time that I stopped Facebooking my life away and started distilling my lived experience into well thought out blog posts again.

Other resolutions for 2010:

5. Buy teaching clothes.
That's right, people, real business casual teaching clothes. No jeans! No sneakers! It is time to grow up and get dressed for work this summer when I teach US History 101.

4. Go to California.
I just looked at Continental Airlines website and found a ticket from where I am to San Francisco for $218. Round trip. WTF. I'm going to California this year and no one can stop me.

3. Buy cycling shoes.
It looks like my hobby of spinning (and eventually road biking) is not a passing fad. It is time to invest in some shoes so my knees won't hurt. I'll be one spin closer to my ride across the US on a bike lifetime goal.

2. Learn to snowshoe.
Last winter I learned to ice skate. This year I'm headed into the wild to learn to snowshoe. One website proclaimed that "if you can walk, you can snowshoe." We'll just have to see about that.

1. Spend more time with my brothers.
They are really great guys and we live near each other for the time being. So, it is time to spend quality time with my little brothers.

So, there you have it, my goals for the year. You'll note that finishing my dissertation is conspicuously absent from the list. That is because becoming Dr. V is a goal for 2011. Sorry, but that is just the way the academic year works. But, no need to fear, I'm working diligently some of the time to hopefully include my dissertation on next year's list.

Happy New Year!

Thankful:

2009-11-25T20:37:00.003-05:00

These days I'm super thankful. I have supportive friends and loving siblings. I have a great profession and supportive mentors. I found a super gay super black church to join with a

Image by ~Sage~ via Flickr

bomb choir. I have good looks and an irresistible personality. What can I say, I'm bursting with thankfulness this year.

So, there you have it, my thankful face of joy. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Today in WTF: This Article from the NYT

2009-11-17T13:45:00.004-05:00

This article attempts to demonstrate how the recession is bringing black people and white people together. I'm going to go ahead and argue that the recession has actually exacerbated the racial tension in this country...birthers, anyone? But this article cites instances of cross-racial commiseration as evidence that racial tensions are dissipating. In Henry County, Georgia, black people and white people are starting to see each other at welfare offices and bond. Black women are explaining food stamps to white women. White ladies are holding lunches at black owned restaurants to help out business.

Of course the article notes that:
And as in the rest of the country, blacks in Henry were more than twice as likely as whites to take out risky sub-prime mortgages, meaning more black families than white are struggling to keep their homes.

The article ends on this note, a quote by one of Henry County's black female residents:
“They’re a little weaker than we are at handling things like this,” she said, adding without rancor, “but I know they get more sympathy than we do.”

Now there's an article I'd like to read--why is it that "...they get more sympathy than we do"?

Today in WTF: Whatever this is...

2009-11-16T18:18:00.002-05:00

Dear Lady Gaga,

You are not fierce enough to be a real queen or the mother of a house (or haus as you spell it).

Thanks,
V

Today in WTF: These pants.

2009-11-12T20:22:00.004-05:00

For more about these pants, click here or here.

Today in WTF: Shark Week

2009-11-11T17:49:00.003-05:00

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Some shark in a New Zealand aquarium gave another shark a cesarean section with his teeth to help her through difficult labor.

The boy shark saved the baby sharks' lives and the mommy shark is just fine. The headline reads, "Sharp Toothed Shark Acts as Midwife."

Today in WTF: What did the five fingers say to the face?

2009-11-10T13:53:00.003-05:00

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Black male Columbia professor punches white female Columbia professor in face over heated argument about race and inequality.

Um...no matter how ridiculous and out of touch my colleagues sometimes can be I've never wanted to actually punch someone in the face. I've been frustrated. I've laughed and snarked with my friends after the fact. But, I'm pretty sure I never wanted to cause someone physical harm.

Happy Halloween

2009-11-01T20:11:00.007-05:00

As a child I didn't celebrate Halloween. My mom decided that because of the holiday's pagan roots (p.s. almost all holidays on the "Christian'' calender have pagan roots), we weren't going to participate. So, now that I'm an adult I've decided that nothing is wrong with dressing up and having a costume party. Every year there are one or two grad student parties. This means that costumes are not "sexy", as the holiday trend usually dictates but, rather, smart and brainy.

At my first Halloween party our hostesses were dressed up as 1950's housewives...who were having an affair...with each other. Another friend was Medea, also known as Tyler Perry. Oh, and there was a Go-go dancer. The dog even had a costume: a turtle. The treats were to die for!

At party number two the theme was "Myths". Some people chose to show up as unicorns others went for something Greek or Roman. But, being grad students, most went for some sort of academic concept or hot political issue: the myth of the bra burning second wave feminist, abstinence only education, a lesbian recruiter, Camelot (ie the Kennedy Administration), and, no joke, a Tea Bagger, tee hee.
I ran into a little trouble coming up with a myth. I mean, let's be honest, most of the myths about black people remain ridiculously offensive. But, there was one myth that I could deploy and still get to wear my afro wig. I went as the Myth of the Black Super Woman.

You're Not in Kansas Anymore!

2009-10-28T17:36:00.004-04:00

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So, today a group of Kansas Crazies decided to show up and protest in my community. If it were up to me, I'd have slept in and not given these people the time of day. But, the undergrads decided that they wanted to have a counter rally that emphasized love and unity. I support the kids and want them to know that I think a measured loving response is a good choice. In the end, their rally had a focal point that forced the crowd to look away from the Crazy. So, I guess, in a way, the undergrads made a point to actively ignore the Crazy.

One interesting point: the coalition that the Crazy inspired today was actually the most interesting part of the whole thing. Thanks to the Crazy, anarchists, high school LGBTQ school groups, proud parents of gay kids, clergy from across religions, Hillel members, Catholic students, drag queens, and members of a number of disparate communities all showed up to celebrate unity. For example, take this conversation I overheard:

Drag Queen (in gold platform heels, no less):
God Loves Everyone!

Kid with Sign (next to her): Yeah, God loves everyone!

DQ: That's right!

KwS: He hates the sin but loves the sinner!

DQ gives KwS oh no you didn't look.

It was conversations like that that fascinated me. People who would not ususally find themselves in coalition were so united against ridiculousness that they got up early (6am for me and my crew) and stood in fall rain to protest. In that spirit, here is a song I wish we'd had blaring at the rally.

The Nouveau Poor: Suck it up, Princess!

2009-10-16T13:38:00.004-04:00

Report: Growing Ranks Of Nouveau Poor Facing Discrimination From Old Poor

I grew up with a considerable amount of privilege. Deciding to stay in school meant postponing a middle class salary for a while and living on a stipend that remains, thankfully, just enough. And so, in a moment of class angst this week I found myself confronted with my privilege. As a kid, I never worried about anything I needed. I even often got things and opportunities that I didn't need but just kinda wanted. I always had shoes and clothes, nice ones actually. I always had a place to live, with my own room and heat and water and cable tv. I also had plenty of extras. My parents paid for me to go to Europe, twice. I didn't earn any of that. I have so much privilege, I was able to decide to go to graduate school to study something that won't really make me much money, in a field where jobs are scarce, and means my contribution back into my family will be negative amounts of money because they helped me out during my first few years here. In all my whining and complaining I found myself becoming exactly what I find so annoying about the whole "frugalista" trend.

The economy is bad. Some Americans just found this out (like me) while others have been suffering for a few generations now. But, like good Americans, we've found ways to market the bad economy. You know what I'm talking about: frugalista/recessionista fashion spreads, tv commercials that begin with the words, "in these hard times", and the NYTimes article/video series all about how hard it is to live in NY now. But, when compared to the Great Depression and some of the stories my grandparents have told me about surviving it (yes, surviving), what has become the topic of the news seems more like middle class disillusionment and strife than actual poverty. This article sums up why the whole "recessionista" bs is annoying.

While some trust fund kid can't get that condo in Williamsburg and whoever writes those annoying frugalista articles is spending $100 on shoes instead of $300, someone is returning to their home in a tent city (well, unless they get shot by someone who hates tent cities). Every Sunday at my amazing gay black church, someone (at times multiple someones) get up and give thanks for having a place to live or getting an interview after a year of hunting for a job to replace the old one. Someone else announces a free prescription program that might help some congregants get the pills they need. And then, we usually pray for someone who is dying from something that is totally preventable...if you have health care.

I am not suffering because of the economy. Sure, I'm paying more for gas and have to wait a few weeks to buy new gym shoes. But, that means I have a car and go to a gym. My funding wasn't cut in the wake of NJ budget cuts. I even got health insurance this year when I wasn't expecting it. And so, I'm confronting my privilege and eating crow right here on the internet for everyone to see. I am, right now, sucking it up and getting to work.

Good Hair

2009-10-09T16:42:00.003-04:00

I have a lot of hair. (See profile picture at right.) I've always had a lot of hair. I was, in fact, born with a full head of thick dark hair. I looked adorable. As you can all see, nothing has changed. So, I'm intrigued by Chris Rock's new project, Good Hair. The whole project was inspired by one of his little girls asking him,"Daddy, why don't I have good hair?" It is a question that is at once sad and to be expected in a world where straight blond hair (that is somehow also curly sometimes and super thick and healthy...no idea who has that hair naturally by the way...) is the standard of beauty that all women are subjected to even if they aren't actively chasing it--though let's be serious, many are.

I'm gonna withhold judgment on this documentary until after I see it...but look out, I'm ready to critique. Until then, watch this.

Costumes for Dogs

2009-09-27T18:24:00.013-04:00

Dogs hate Halloween with good reason. Their people often dress them up and feel compelled to make them look like a range of things/people that aren't dogs. You've all seen it. You've even thought it was cute. And, okay fine, I think it is totally cute to see a dog dressed up as, say, a hot dog.

Or, his or her favorite celebrity dog:And it is totally cute to imagine your little kid dressed as Dora the Explorer and your pet dog dressed as Diego:
Or your dog as Dorothy (with Ruby Slippers, of course) and you as Toto:

I wonder, though, if there should be some public service announcement that there is a line when it comes to dressing your dog up as people. For example, while I'm fine with dressing your dog up as Indiana Jones...

I don't think it is okay to dress your dog up as an Indian...ur...Native American, as the website selling this costume labels this number, moccasins, braids, and all:

Nor do I think it is okay to make your dog into a "Harem Dog":

And while I'm at it, whoever came up with this "Little Spanish Bandito" costume deserves to be slapped:Is it really necessary to dress your dog up in a racist costume? That last one has me questioning the cute factor of the Dora and Diego costumes. I mean are they just gateways to thinking that the "bandito" is okay? I know that Halloween challenges people's ability to avoid being racist. But can we leave the dogs out of it? They hate Halloween as it is, do we really need to make them racist on top of totally uncomfortable?

Oh and one last thing, dressing your dog up as "Big Daddy Pimp Dog" is also totally not okay:All costumes can be found here or here or here.

I Know A Little German

2009-09-09T14:25:00.006-04:00

Some day, if I ever get a chance, I shall write a book, or warning, on the character and temperament of the dachshund and why he can't be trained and shouldn't be. I would rather train a striped zebra to balance on an Indian club than induce a dachshund to heed my slightest command. -E.B. White

For the past week I've been a guest in a long haired dachshund's house. Annie is a dachshund of a certain age and as such expects that her routine be adhered too. Being that she mostly sleeps with the occasional break for eating and going outside to the little dachshund's room (gravel patch in the back yard), these expectations didn't seem too difficult. I like barking at the mailman and sniffing around the yard. I'm all for attacking a chewy bone or two. Snuggling on the couch--no problem!

But there was one thing: Annie eats breakfast at 4:00am. I thought that she'd just sleep in with me and I could get away with 8am or even 9am. But the dachshund is a proud independent breed renowned for their human training ability. They're smart. That's what makes them fun. But, make no mistake, while Annie spent the day looking like her adorable picture featured above, she was quite different in the morning. Her tenacity reminded me of this image and this image and this image. All of a sudden I'd feel two little paws on my back and then a sharp bark, "Breakfast!" No amount of cuddling or petting or soothing talk would distract her. I would then pick her up and try not to fall down the stairs with her tail wagging. Breakfast was served. After which she expected to be delivered upstairs to bed. To be fair, she wasn't like that at dinner time. She was meek and mild with the occasional yip at the recycling guys outside. She was a professional snuggler with big brown eyes. Something about 4am just brought out her inner dachshund and all of a sudden I was just a plebe meant to fetch for her.

As I write this post she's cuddled up next to me taking her pre-dinner/post-playtime nap. She sighs occasionally and repositions or looks up at me with soft brown eyes. I really am a dog person and that it has been very nice to have a furry little snuggle bug in my lap. Despite the 4am wake up call and the battle with allergies (she has long hair and my nose wasn't too happy with that), we had a good time. She accepted me as her alternate food source and began a rigorous training program. Can you blame her? So, while I'll gladly sleep in to 9am tomorrow, I will miss her snuggling when I watch Top Chef.

Back to School

2009-09-07T18:10:00.005-04:00

I was perusing Blogger Buzz and found out that Blogger was supporting a widget that allows blogs to raise money for worthy causes. Through a website called Social Vibe you can choose a cause and a sponsor for the cause. For example, I chose to support Donors Choose, an organization that provides much needed school supplies to underfunded schools. Teachers post projects on the website. For example, one music teacher needs music stands while another elementary teacher wishes her classroom had some educational puzzles. When you visit the site you can choose what project you'd like to help and how much you can give to help it. After picking a cause that I like I then picked Showtime as the sponsor (see above add for Nurse Jackie). The widget available from blogger doesn't let you choose a sponsor...but I'm working on that.

While they don't explain it on their website, I'm going to guess that businesses who need advertising pay the people who maintain Social Vibe to make them a sponsor. Bloggers post what is essentially an add for said businesses or organizations and in turn the "sponsors" donate money to each blogger's cause. This must somehow cost less for the companies than paying Google for add space/entering Google's famous add auctions. Also, there isn't a very clear disclosure of how much money each "click" on the big add widget will earn.

Anyway, in honor of back to school season I'm going to feature the widget on my blog. Feel free to click away and earn some help for under funded for schools.

It's a mad mad mad mad world...

2009-09-05T11:48:00.007-04:00

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I recently started watching Mad Men after Ms. Cheese encouraged me to tune in to the very popular show. For those of you who don't know Ms. Cheese, she happens to be a very good 20th Century Americanist with research interests in Women's and Gender History, the History of Girlhood, Cultural History, Race, Queer History, and is incredibly well versed in the pop culture of the 20th Century. But, I'd avoided Mad Men assuming that it was some sort of '60 nostalgia fest like The Wonder Years or American Dreams but with sex and impeccably costumed jaded adults instead of soon to be disillusioned teenagers. I was skeptical and ready to be offended. But, after asking Ms. Cheese about how the series handled race in the early '60s, I decided to trust her thoughtful analysis.

As it turns out, the show was offensive in the way that the Sopranos was offensive: the character's are racist and sexist. More significantly, the world they occupy is as much a character as the shows' flawed protagonists. Just like Tony Soprano, Don Draper is flawed and conflicted. He isn't simply a sympathetic "product of his environment". The audience watches as Draper makes choices and suffers, or avoids, consequences. And the same goes for the show's other characters. Are there any black people? Yup, there are and they're even well written. Draper's maid, Carla, is no Mammy, for example. After watching the second episode of the third season with Ms. Cheese I was excited to find an nice break from "reality tv" drivel.

And then I watched last week's episode. If you read the synopsis or watch it on YouTube you'll find out that one of the characters performs in black face. Now, it was a jaw dropping moment for many of the people I know who were watching the episode. It wasn't simply uncomfortable historical accuracy like Betty, Don's pregnant wife, boozing and smoking, for example. I was upset. I posted a snarky recap on Facebook.

But, after talking to Ms. Cheese again, I really began to think about what exactly Mad Men is about. The show isn't nostalgic. But, as contemporary conservatives rant about "wanting their country back", the show laid out exactly what "their country" looked like. Which, I'll add, is probably partly what the writers were doing. Unlike the regular audience of Mad Men, I haven't been following these characters for two seasons. Their racism and sexism aren't old to me. And now that I reflect I'm beginning to think that maybe the audience needs to be reminded about the real abhorrent nature of the type of privilege being depicted. Unfortunately, racism and sexism aren't amusing relics of the past. And, as the audience is aware, the character's are amazingly clueless about the rapid changes that are in store for them. As Ms. Cheese said, "It's political. They're fiddling while Rome is burning!"

So, I'm going to give the show a chance. I want to know if I really think a show devoid of character's of color outside of a limited white gaze can "go there", that is, have a scene in black face. I'm going to watch the first two seasons and revisit My Old Kentucky Home (Season 3 Episode 3) after some careful analysis. The writing is too good and my initial impression was too positive not to give the show a fair shake. Besides, Ms. Cheese sure does know how to serve a cocktail and I'd hate to miss those every Sunday night because I was too stubborn to be thorough.

And we're back...

2009-09-04T13:35:00.003-04:00

After a glorious "staycation" (vacation at home) I'm back along with this blog and better than ever! Okay, she's back at least. The staycation was devoid of excitement for me. As far as I know, my blog enjoyed her trip to the beach and remains very tight lipped about what exactly happened on that beach in Cuba (see previous post).

Anyway, I got a new roommate. New Roommate is great: respectful of common space, clean, driven academically, fun socially, oh and loves women's basketball as much, if not more, than I do. We're both huge college basketball fans and even managed to get some tickets to a local WNBA game to watch some of our old college favorite play in the pros.

The whole thing was super exciting. New Roommate and I even made it on the jumbo-tron because of our dance moves. All in all, great roommate bonding and our team won

This Blog is on Vacation

2009-08-11T13:56:00.008-04:00

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My blog is sitting on this beach sipping on some rum. She looks good in her bikini and she plans on sleeping until September. Sorry, readers, she needs a break.

You've all probably noticed that I haven't been posting. This isn't because there is nothing going on in my life. The opposite is true, actually. I've been on a few adventures since posting about my frustration over Gates-gate. I've moved from River City. I've endured stifling heat. I've begun fellowship/grant applications. I've done secondary reading for my dissertation. I hiked along the James River and even put my foot in. I even ventured to Southampton County, VA. (That's where this picture of a cotton gin, used by slaves who resided in the county circa Nat Turner used, was taken. )But, reader, I'm tired. This blog is also tired. We need a vacation from reading about slaves, and commenting on the hot messes we see in the news every day, and thinking about anything more taxing than who will be on the cast of this year's Top Chef. And so, with the click of a button, I'm going to send my blog to a beach in Cuba and I am going to vanish until the school year starts. I'll be back with a summer roundup post sometime next month. Done and done.

The Gates Incident: What's Goin' On?

2009-07-24T10:34:00.006-04:00

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

And, here's some more commentary.

Race has always been an issue in America. Usually I don't make sweeping statements like that but, in this case, it is totally accurate. Anxiety over slavery almost ended the constitutional convention at the dawn of the republic. Race was always an issue and, barring some sort of supernatural happening (or alien attack), will continue to be, at least in my lifetime. The latest on Henry Louis (Skip) Gates, the conflation of the issue with the health care debate, and the general to do about the situation brings a few events to mind: what about that guy that got shot in cold blood on New Years in Oakland, CA? Or, you know, the rest of us who don't live in Harvard's Ivory Tower? I mean, if this incident actually forces a conversation about racism and racial profiling, then great. Police violence, racial profiling, and persistent racial inequality need attention and need to be addressed. Period.

How do we make the conversation productive though especially as conservatives marshal the "reverse discrimination" defense (I don't think reverse discrimination exists...i mean, it is discrimination or it isn't, right? The reverse of discrimination would be the absence of discrimination...but I digress.) If anything, the Gates incident proves the Bill Cosbys of the debate wrong: you can pull your pants up, get an Ivy League job, and have national recognition, but if a cop is called to your house you are a black person. The incident can bring attention to systematic inequality and to the defense of those black people who do not have the social capital of Gates. But we'll see.

As this article points out, perhaps the outrage Gates expressed was more about him not being "that kind of black person"...you know the kind who get jacked up by the police. And that is the problem, the incident is being viewed as an outrage because Gates is affluent and connected to, among other institutions, Harvard University...not that he is a black man. Which makes me even less hopeful that the Gates incident will advance discussions on race and racism...or help out those dealing with police brutality all the time...or black plain clothes police officers who get fired on by their own police force...or black men reaching for their ID...or people like those day campers in Pennsylvania who were refused access to a pool they'd paid to use...or black professors, for that matter.

After watching TV coverage of how racial anxiety among certain demographics of white people has spiked after the election (from Pat Buchanan on Rachel Maddow to that crazy lady at a town hall meeting who doesn't think that President Obama is an American citizen to this woman who is determined to win at the "bullet box" if she can't win at the ballot box), I think that incidents of violence (political, social, emotional, mental, and, yes, physical) are only going to increase . People of color and our white allies need to be ready to address this increased violence. Above all, we cannot afford to be surprised and shocked. Race baiting is the oldest trick in the book, and we've got to defuse it because it can have very real costs, paid for in human life, if we aren't ready.

Pork and Peanuts and Pine, Oh My!

2009-07-20T11:39:00.006-04:00

This weekend I accompanied The Archaeologist to the Surry County Pork Peanut and Pine Festival. Being that I am from a part of the country that has neither pork nor peanuts nor pine (accept for in South Jersey...but I've never braved the Jersey Devil in the Pine Barrens), I was intrigued to experience a festival dedicated to all three things. While there was a surprising lack of pine, there were stands dedicated to both peanuts and pork.
I learned quite a bit about peanuts:
a) they grow underground but they are not roots. They're the seed of the plant and begin forming above ground before the plant burrows them into the soil for protection; b) peanuts have nocholesterol and are very healthy; c) peanut oil doesn't transfer taste or hold taste from food to food. So, the same peanut oil can be used to fry multiple things.

I learned less about pork. Mostly, the pork stand confirmed what I already suspected: pork is incredibly cute before we eat it. However, I love ribs, pork chops, and barbecue too much to let this ruin my time in Virginia where, above all else, they know how to cook a pig.

The festival was like most community festivals: vendors from local organizations, craters, and musical guests that leave something to be desired. However, I will say that I've begun to experience what south side/tidewater Virginia has to offer: mainly pork and peanuts with the occasional pine. Of course, I also got a bag of butter toffee peanuts making the festival a win for me.

Let Me Tell Ya 'Bout My Best Friend

2009-07-13T10:46:00.003-04:00

My Best Friend is a descendant of Pocahontas, famed Powhatan Princess. Here he is with "Grammy" as he calls her, while we attended a recent party at James Fort. While it would be funny if he stayed like that all night and refused to leave "Grammy's" side, we toured the grounds, merry made with the locals, and even enjoyed a fireworks display. I have to say, Best Friend and I had an amazing visit, as always.

Touring the Museum of the Confederacy

2009-07-12T10:16:00.008-04:00

Best Friend and I have a tradition of engaging in uncomfortable problematic tourism. We visited a plantation when I visited his home state, for example. He asked before his visit if there was any Confederate tourism to be had in River City. The answer there is, of course, yes. Honestly, you've just got to walk down the street and you'll eventually run across a monument of some kind to some historic regiment that fought off the Yankees (or failed to in the case of River City in 1865.) But, I thought it would be a special kind of treat to go to the Museum of the Confederacy and the Confederate White House, a whole building and organization dedicated to preserving the history of the "Lost Cause".

Now, I could continue with a post about how dumb and racist the whole museum is ending with some sort of allusion to the suffering of slavery. But, since I'm confidant that my readership is able to determine that the museum is racist and that the justification for its celebratory tone is based on less than intelligent reasoning, I'm actually going to offer a more in depth analysis than that. To be honest, none of what I just described was particularly astonishing. I knew before I went that the museum and the majority of its patrons fostered a certain type of nostalgia for an ahistorical memory of the "Old South" with its moonlight and magnolias. I'm made aware by the abundance of monuments to generals and soldiers in this town that the memory of the CSA is not one of shame and reconciliation but, rather one of pride and affection. So, the statement that "slavery, a practice guaranteed by the Constitution and custom" was not the cause of the American Civil War at the entrance to the museum's permanent exhibit wasn't particularly shocking. Plenty of people, of all shades and origins, North and South, are uncomfortable discussing American slavery. I know this because I've got to teach students about slavery in America frequently and I engage colleges in discussions about my research and I've also got to be an apparently black woman in predominantly white (and often male) spaces on a regular basis. So, denial about the brutality of slavery and the fact that it is a morally abhorrent practice is surprisingly common and has ceased to phase me.

I didn't go to the museum to confront the docents and tour guides. I went to disrupt by being present. I assume it is easier to revel in one's lauded Confederate heritage when there are no decedents of slaves along for the tour. That's why I visit public history sites like privately owned plantations and museums. I would posit that my mission was successful, too. While Best Friend remained baffled by the museum's celebratory tone and the tour groups willing participation in the glorification of the South's violent racist past (and present for that matter), I remained calm and waited.

When the tour guide asked if there were any questions, I asked two. Number One: "Where was the kitchen? Was it in the basement or in an out building?" This was followed by silence as the tour group acknowledged my presence in the room. The tour guide faltered and, without making eye contact, answered that the kitchen was in an outbuilding. She then mentioned that the two enslaved people that the Davis family brought with them from Mississippi to Virginia slept above the kitchen. Then someone asked a question about a light fixture. Number two: "Were the Davis's enslaved people men or women?" This was followed by even less eye contact and some mumblings about Davis's kindness with his children and his use of a black driver on his Mississippi plantation. And with two reasonable questions the tour was disrupted.

In my experience the tour was not even remotely representative of the opinions of most Virginians...or at least not the Virginians I know. Most roll their eyes when CSA tourism is mentioned. The Museum of the Confederacy receives no state or federal funding. It has been privately funded since its establishment at the end of the 19th century. However, the presence of a museum supported by privet citizens without any aide testifies to the fact that there is still a population of people out there that find the museum important, meaningful, and worth their money. In other words, more than one someone feels that the four years that Virginia was a part of the CSA are worth commemoration. As Best Friend commented in the gift shop, "Aren't these people embarrassed?" Unfortunately, no one on the tour was embarrassed at all. They were happy to soak up the ahistorical history lesson that the guide gave them.

The ray of hope: The Civil War Center. Run by the National Park Service, the center explicitly addresses the history of Union and Confederate forces along side the African American story on both sides of the line. One hopes that history buffs, and Confederate enthusiasts alike, will visit this site and hear a more diverse and complicated view of the American Civil War. I promise a full report after my visit to the Civil War Center next week.

Some Thoughts About Michael Jackson

2009-06-29T09:08:00.004-04:00

The best part of that clip is Michael's move into the very white audiance. Knowing that the Jackson 5 was going to be on TV got many a Black houshold to sit down (or get up) and watch. I wish I could've heard the jokes made about the guy that didn't want to dance with Michael. I wish I could've seen the moves that people tried out in their living rooms, just in case they could ever get into a taping and Michael asked them to dance.

As I drove up Rt. 95 this weekend I tuned into multiple MJ tribute hours. Each had some type of radio audience participation included in the program. One asked listeners to call in to talk about their "Michael Moment". Men and women from about four generations called in to share what they thought of when they thought of Michael Jackson. If the broadcasts were international...I'm sure there would have been even more hours of memories.

I grew up with Michael Jackson. My dad did too. So, did my mom and my two brothers, one of whom was born in 1990. We all have Michael Jackson memories. My most recent "Michael Moment" is as follows. A group of friends was over my place this spring to watch the Lword. One of the crew or cast interviewed about the show's impact on television likened the Lword's first broadcast to "watching the Moonwalk". I turned to a friend and asked, "Which one?"

Michael was a complicated figure. We loved him as a little boy. We knew he was the quintessential performer and that none of the little kids running around as "pop stars" today could ever have existed without him. But, we also knew he was struggling--with himself, with racism, with his lost childhood, with the unthinkably intrusive nature of fame at the end of the 20th century. As I listened to people call in I realized that he was spoken of as a beloved cousin, who "had some issues", but the family remembers with fondness and love. His weirdness wasn't unlike some people's real cousins--the one who fell prey to drugs in the 80s or lost his mind after serving in Vietnam in the 70s. His music was the sound track to a lot of heart ache in Black America: the conservative backlash to the Civil Rights era, deintustrialization, crack and the Regan years. There he was, on MTV no less, pushing popular music beyond what people had thought possible and garnering international fame.

In the end his story is sadder because we all watched it happen. The mess that remains will be trotted out in the media and more money will be made on Michael Jackson. But, his music is the sound track to three decades of memories and generations of experience. His voice as a little boy will continue to play at family reunions. His hits as a young man will continue to be sampled and played to get dance floors ignited.

Juneteenth

2009-06-21T10:48:00.005-04:00

In January of 1863 President Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation, freeing all slaves held in those states that had seceded from the Union. This did not free slaves held in the Union...meaning that slaves held in so called border states were not set free nor were slaves held in states gradually phasing out slavery. In the January of 1865, Congress passed the 13th amendment abolishing slavery throughout the United States. Finally, in April of 1865, the American Civil War came to an end with Lee's surrender at Appomattox, VA. This, of course, would mean that slaves held in the once Confederate States of America would've been free, three times over.

For the enslaved in Texas, this wasn't a reality until, as tradition holds, June 19, 1865 . Making the 19th "Juneteenth", the day that many Black communities celebrate emancipation. As a historical side note, emancipation was much slower in coming than one might think. There are stories of slave owners neglecting to mention emancipation for longer than a couple of months after the Civil War was over. I've also read more than one diary entry by a former slave owner distraught and confused as to why his/her slaves would want to leave the plantation. The South was a mess after the destruction of the Civil War and newly defeated southern whites were none to happy to give up the labor force they needed to rebuild infrastructure, cultivate the land, and perform the region's labor. For whites, just not telling African Americans that they were free was, for a moment, their best hope at extracting their last few months of enslaved labor.

It is also important to remember that large numbers of African Americans emancipated themselves by running to Union lines. Both African American men and women served with Union forces. Harriet Tubman, Black Moses, helped Union forces navigate the waterways and swamps of Maryland's Eastern Shore, for example. To be honest, the most lasting impact of Lincoln's 1863 Emancipation Proclamation, the proclamation made it possible for African American men to serve with the Union Army. Many men ran to the Army eager to fight for their and their family's freedom.

So, last night I went to an event held by the Elegba Folk Society here in River City. Members of the EFS lead participants on a tour of the newly established and marked Slave Trail, leading from the place along the James River where the enslaved were unloaded for market all the way to the slave grave yard near the site of the old city hanging grounds. We walked along the river by torchlight through the streets that were once the sights of slave markets, auction blocks, and slave jails.

We walked along the canal dug by the enslaved. We walked through the grave yard where hundreds, possibly thousands, now rest beneath a local university's parking lot. While the tour commemorated and helped the group to remember the legacy of slavery here in River City through dance, drumming, and dramatic readings, the group was also dedicated to making apparent the lack of remembrance and recognition of slavery in River city. The slave system as a business made River City wealthy. The enslaved literally made River City: enslaved labor dug its canals, built its buildings, gave Virginians the wealth to maintain power in the halls of National Government. And yet, their stories remain hidden in the shadows of Confederate monuments. While there were moments of celebration, there was a tone of grief and sorrow. It was hard to stand in the place where Gabriel, the famed slave rebel, was executed, silent and proud. It was eerie to look up and see the modern city looming and light brightly, over the shadowy spaces once called Wall Street because the trade in humans was so lucrative.

It was encouraging to see so many African American families in attendance. In the span of five minutes I saw children wide eyed in strollers enthralled by historical readings, teenagers eager to bear the torches, and a group of middle aged folks reminiscing about the days of integration in River City's high schools and looking forward to staying in touch on Facebook. There were a handful of white people in the crowd. Notably, the event was not advertised widely beyond the black community and their participation in the event was unexpected and refreshing. It was a successful celebration and a needed moment of remembrance.

The 'Berg

2009-06-18T13:58:00.002-04:00

My spot is still there--the spot on back campus where the trees open up and you can see the mountains. I didn't spent much time on campus reminiscing. Though, I have to admit that while there has been a whirlwind of change in the past few years, I was glad to see that the whole place hadn't sunk to the core of the Earth in a fiery blaze.

I got a new college sweatshirt. I went to the one good bar in town. I visited with an old friend. It was nice.

Mobile Blogging: The NessieBerry in Action

2009-06-13T19:24:00.005-04:00

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

So, I took the "new every two" plunge and got a blackberry. For those of you following the to iPhone or not to iPhone drama on Facebook, this is not surprise. I spent a while researching my options and came to the conclusion that I wanted what I can't have: an iPhone with Verizon phone service. Enter the NessieBerry (aka the Blackberry Curve.)

I am excited to try out my new mobile blogging capabilities and plan on linking to my mobile blog in the sidebar. I'd like to take this opportunity to assure my readers that you'll be able to enjoy the same less than mobile blogging here at V's Photo Blog...but if you want to check out shorter spontaneous posts give the mobile blog a try.

Virginia is for Lovers?: Gay RVA Blog Launch

2009-06-12T11:51:00.002-04:00

So, I didn't have my camera on me...but you can check out this blog for River City Queers. As some of you know, I've actually had trouble finding the gays here. I went to a woman's college in Virginia and had this impression that the state was super gay and all the women were lesbians. Then I moved to River City and, well, I couldn't find the gays anywhere. I almost resorted to cranking up the Indigo Girls and Cher in hopes that some gays would be lured out of hiding. I thought I'd start checking the hot spots: Home Depot loading docks, home decorating shops, hair shops, Abercrombie & Fitch stores, Dick's Sporting Goods...Then I saw this blog launch advertised and decided to check it out. Coincidentally, there was also an Indigo Girls concert here last night. But, I figured I'd meet a mixture of young gays if I went to the blog launch. Turns out that there are lots of gays here...they just have to hide a little bit because of issues with violence (and those issues are real, even in River City). Anyway, I met some very nice gays and lesbians. If nothing else, BFF will have a wonderful visit when he's here in a few weeks.

Virginia is for Food: Broad Appetit

2009-06-08T18:53:00.007-04:00

Last weekend I decided to venture downtown to enjoy some of River City's many delectable dining options at Broad Appetit. There is something really attractive to me about strolling down a main thoroughfare eating reasonably priced samples of local restaurants. I settled on a plate of BBQ from a place called Q Barbecue that came with baked beans, potato salad, coleslaw, brisket and barbecue (pulled pork to us Yankees). Then I saw this logo:
The logo is for a company called Soul Ice. Not only do they provide the costomer with 26 different flavors to choose from but they're minority owned and have a commitment to developing entrepreneurs. Naturally, I couldn't resist trying some Soul Ice. It turns out that Soul Ice is actually sorbet...but really, who's gonna hire "Sorbet Ice" to come to their cookout/corporate event/party? Who wants to go home and tell their friends that they're starting a Sorbet buisness. Now, Soul Ice, that's catchy. It got me to buy some. It was also really good and totally organic. I had the mango flavor and it rivals (and surpasses) the sorbet offering at Wholefoods. It also totally hit the spot as I wandered around in the sun on a Sunday afternoon.

Virginia is for Monuments

2009-06-06T21:28:00.008-04:00

Virginia is for...monuments? Yup. Monuments. They're everywhere: monuments to pioneers, monuments to famous Virginia locations, and Civil War generals, let's not forget them. Of course, this blog has been mostly preoccupied with who, where, and what, do not have monuments. Arthur Ashe, yes. Nat Turner, no. Battle Fields, yes. Slave markets, no. Fancy plantation houses, yes. Slave cabins, no.

So, imagine, if you will, a beautiful suburban mall. A mall that allows its patrons to wander for hours outdoors in a faux downtown atmosphere devoid of all those pesky realities of real down towns (parking problems, poorer people, lack of a food court, etc.) You're imagining Short Pump Town Center. It is expansive and clean and full of monuments. Monuments? Yes, monuments.

There are predictable monuments to Virginia's many US Presidents and history. Columns with the men's famous profiles line one of the mall's entrances. Each colomn has a little sign explaining the importance of each. Of course, that wasn't as bewildering as the Ella Fitzgerald statue. Yes, the First Lady of Song was from Virginia. Yes, her voice remains one of America's greatest...but, um, why is she in a mall? It get's better, reader, because Ella Fitzgerald isn't the only person with a monument at the mall. Powhatan, famed Native American Chief of Virginia's Algonquin speaking Natives, has a monument in front of Nordstrom across from Victoria's Secret.

Questions that this illicits:

1)Why are people of color memorialized at the mall?

2)How did the Virginia Council of Indians feel about being asked to help design a monument to Powhatan...in a mall?

3)Why does Ella Fitzgerald look like Tina Turner?

Touring Shirley

2009-05-31T21:22:00.006-04:00

Jamestown wasn't what the boatload of Lords and tradesmen who founded it expected it to be. There was no gold. So, in 1613 an Englishman decided to just grow some. He traveled up the James River and founded a plantation. In Virginia in the 17th Century, Tobacco was the new gold.

In 1732, Shirley Plantation fell into the hands of John Carter (oldest son of Robert "King" Carter) by virtue of a particularly advantageous marriage to Elizabeth Hill. The two built the "great house" and to this day their descendants occupy the house and grounds. Which may have had an effect on they type of tour we got there.

Perhaps it is the fact that Shirley Plantation is "the oldest family business in North America" or maybe it was just the mostly white tour group, but the guide never once mentioned the fact that the Carter's relied on enslaved labor. The Carter's were possibly the wealthiest Virginians ever. "King" Carter owned upwards of 40 plantations, held over 700 slaves, and had land holdings that reached to the Ohio River Valley. I don't imagine that his first born son was hurting for cash. Never the less, the great house was built. The molding was hand carved. The tobacco, and later wheat and corn, were tended. But, the tour guide remained evasive about who, exactly, did all the work and accomplished all the architectural feats that make Shirley such a valuable example of mid-18th century trends in home construction. It was bizarre. I don't think I've ever visited a plantation where, at the very least, the presence of slaves wasn't acknowledged.

When British Buddy (a new pal and fellow 19th century buff) and I trekked out to the out buildings we did find one poster about slaves and indentured servants, who would've been the plantation's earliest labor force. Which outbuilding had the poster, you ask? Why the kitchen, of course.

What is lost by admitting that enslaved people built Shirley Plantation, worked the fields, tended the grounds, cooked the food, produced the opulence that the Carter's lived on? Correction, the opulence that the Carter's still live on. But, as the hidden poster acknowledged, the slave quarters were never in sight of the great house. They were near the fields. Domestic slaves lived above the kitchen. The dramatic view of the James River was never obstructed. So, perhaps, the past has been passed and each visitor is left holding the silence bearing witness to the violence of omission.

Photos:
The Great House- originally there were two smaller two story houses called "flankers" in addition to the large main house.

A View of the James- The river banks are directly behind the great house.

Me and British Buddy

Friends and Family

2009-05-26T20:53:00.006-04:00

Durham, NC--home of Duke University, Loco Pops, and me (for six summers during college/grad school.) I was there this past weekend to connect with some friends who are very much like family. My biological cousins live so far away that sometimes I just adopt cousins wherever I happen to travel and settle for a while. I saw Cousin G and Cousin H this weekend. Booze was consumed. (Note the sunglasses in the above photo.)The construction of that last sentence is passive for a reason...we have no idea how all that bourbon and wine disappeared...it is a mystery to be revisited on another occasion I'm sure.

We saw some college baseball at the Durham Bull's baseball park. The ACC was playing its championship round robin tournament. We caught the UNC v. Clemson game. It was all of the things a good baseball game should be--it was a close game and it mattered. If UNC had won they'd have had a small chance of ending up in the final. As we headed into extra innings Cousin Hill and I found ourselves actually enjoying the sport of baseball. Good times. Someone from UNC even hit the giant bull and, though there is no way to verrify that this still happens, won a steak.

Of course my favorite part about visiting Durham has to be Brown Sugah. While he's getting on in doggy years, he's still the same sweet southern gentleman. As he heads off the parts west with the cousins and Daly (his kitty cat sidekick), I'm sure he'll retain his North Carolina way of talkin'. Sigh. I'm gonna miss my Samson.

All in all it was a great trip and a nice break from the archive's less than social halls. Add a great trip to Durham to a nice bike ride and battlefield tour in Willliamsburg and Yorktown and you've got my very nice weekend full of friends and family.

Where it all began...

2009-05-17T18:47:00.010-04:00

There is a big beautiful visitor center near the 1607 Jamestown site. Not to be confused with the Jamestown Settlement living history museum a few minutes away, the Historic Jamestowne visitor center was built by the National Park Service in anticipation of the Grand Commonwealth's 400th anniversary in 2007. The center and cafe are so new that the Park Service website doesn't even have a picture of it yet. While the site of the original Jamestown was long the site of a huge dusty dirty archaeological project, the recent anniversary attracted distinguished visitors like the Queen of England, Elizabeth II. Now, the new facilities house a nicely curated museum, a flashy theater that features a video about the basic history of Jamestown, and, of course, a gift shop.

I have to admit a fascination with gift shops. It always strikes me what items are offered for sale in them. In this case there were the usual t shirts, historical maps, a respectable collection of history books on the topic of early colonial history, post cards, earthenware Christmas ornaments that read "Jamestowne 1607" and a children's figurine set that includes settlers, lords, Natives and domesticated animals for hours of enjoyment. The item that drew the most attention from the crowd gathered in the shop when I visited it was the recent History Channel documentary about the Jamestowne Rediscovery Project. Around the tv screen were gathered about 5 to 8 middle aged men intently watching as artifacts were explained. They were mesmerized.

The crowd was a mix of families with middle school aged and younger children, adults, and people in 17th century costume. To be honest there were really only maybe about five or six other people of color there--a black couple, a family of East Asian Americans, and me. Why don't POC go to these sites? Why don't we visit the "Triangle of History"? Why aren't our kids there learning about what happened where, as the site's publicity likes to claim, "America began"?

The video and the National Park Service exhibit were explicit in their interpretation of African American and Native American History. Indentured servitude, slavery, and the ever developing racial ideology of the European settlers in the 16th and 17th centuries were all presented in very engaging ways alongside artifacts. There was even a section of the exhibit dedicated to European women's contributions to the settlement. Walking across the long bridge over swamp and marsh that leads to the archaeological dig offers tourists the opportunity to ask archaeologists in the field about what they've just seen and read about in the visitor center. The archaeologists are happy to speak about the range of cultures and ethnicity they've found are represented in the material culture discovered at the site. For example, the piece of mettle my friend is holding in the picture above is an example of the catholic artifacts found at the site. It appears that Protestants were not solely responsible for the founding of England's first permanent settlement.

The picture above probably just looks like dirt. It is actually the basement of a prominent mid-17th Century settler's home. The archaeologists have to excavate and catalog it before moving on to whatever is underneath it. But, when I was shown this dirt pit it became much more than some old bricks. As my Archaeologist Guide explained, "Those steps on the right were part of the cellars ramp that allowed for loading goods into the cellar. The steps at the top there, to the left of the ramp, were the servant or slave entrance." Then we moved on to bigger, better, deeper holes that have been yielding very early artifacts from around 1607-1610. But that moment stuck with me--"the slave entrance."

Perhaps that is why there weren't more people of color around. The past is not a site of great nostalgia about democracy and freedom. I know that I can't look at people costumed like it is 1607 and not think about slave traders. But maybe that's just me. I noticed though that when I entered the space, there were a few tourists who looked a bit uncomfortable having me around. Some just wanted to talk about guns and democracy. Others glanced nervously at their kids, perhaps wondering if they were going to have to talk about slavery. While the staff were all, for the most part, very approachable and willing to talk about the complex story of Jamestown, the key demographic of the site's visitors wasn't really willing to engage the questions about America's origins that the archeological site elicits. It was like being transported to my favorite episode of Colonial House where the "colonists" meet local Natives, as interpreted by their present day descendants. The "colonists" aren't very happy to confront the consequences of the events that they're reenacting. But it turns out to be a moment of teaching through awkwardness on the part of the "colonists".

So, I'm on a mission. Time to disrupt. There are enough Confederate historical sites within River City's limits to keep me busy until August. It is time to just enter spaces and to try to learn a thing or two about public history, its presentation style, goals, and results. I started out this weekend "where it all began"...but I happen to live where it all began again. This is going to be fun.

The Journey to River City

2009-05-15T13:24:00.003-04:00

Moving around as a kid we sometimes flew to our new home state (California to New Jersey) and other times we drove as a family (New Jersey to Illinois) . For some reason driving always gave me a sense of calm and a true concept of distance. Mile by mile I could feel the separation between each place, the old one and the new one. Flying across the country had the effect of making California seem like it was five hours away, delaying the grief of how far away home and extended family really were. Driving to the Midwest gave the whole family a sense of leaving New Jersey behind. It was cathartic. It was so necessary. So, now driving as I migrate for the summer is almost essential.

Finn and I hit the road at about 11am. There was some mild traffic in D.C. So, we got to our destination, River City, at about 4:30. He made it. He just sucked it up and endured the ride in a pasta sauce jar. He is now comfortable in his gallon sized glass cube in my new room happily building a new bubble nest. Likewise, I am in comfortable surroundings at a local coffee shop blogging and missing my friends already.

The first order of business is to settle in to my new city. The second order is to find community. Stay tuned, Reader, because the adventure hasn't even revved up yet.

Furry Little Gentleman

2009-05-11T23:01:00.005-04:00

I spent the weekend with my furry little gentleman friend. He lives in NYC and is an excellent snuggler. We strolled the streets of Manhattan together. He peed on things and I looked up at the buildings. Each walk was like a little goodbye to NYC until the summer's end.

I Knew You Were Comin' So I Baked A Cake

2009-05-09T12:21:00.001-04:00

How to Throw a Birthday Party:

2009-05-08T19:33:00.005-04:00

Mizz K and Mizz S know how to throw a party. Follow these simple guidelines and you too can approach the spectacularness that is a party at their house.

1. Graciously read all of the cards that come with your gifts. You never know what tiny bit of tenderness can be hiding in there.
2. Never be afraid to enlist help during the present opening. It is always a good idea to include everyone in the fun.
3. Just let your enthusiastic friends take the obligatory "group birthday photo". Sure someone will inevitably be closing her eyes or looking at the wrong camera...but think of the memories you'll make squished together uncomfortably.

Finally, be sure to supply not one, not two, not three, but FOUR fabulous desserts. If you can't do that... you may as well just stop planning your party because Mizz K and Mizz S will have you beat EVERY TIME. Period.

Checking It Twice

2009-05-01T18:24:00.003-04:00

Writing a list can be therapeutic. I know it calms my nerves and makes my life seem manageable. As I get ready to migrate for the summer I feel like a list is in order.

Let's see:
1) Get room ready for tenant. Status: In progress.
I've purchased new sheets. I've scoped out storage space for my stuff in the basement. I've decided to have keys made on Sunday. I've contacted my subletor in Research City and have confirmed my arrival date.

2) Decide what needs to travel and what needs to stay. Status:Actively Procrastinating.

3) Set research goals. Status: See item 5.

4) Call archives and schmooze with the "gate keepers" (aka archivists). Status: In Progress.
I have some good contacts and have done some preliminary schmoozing. Now it is time to up the ante with some personal phone calls.

5) Meet with adviser one last time. Status: Adviser AWOL.
Not to fear, I've had this happen before. Luckily I know where she lives.

It'll Be Choreographed ...It'll Be Good

2009-04-22T12:23:00.002-04:00

The latest ridiculousness over gay marriage has had me thinking: have we reached the point where most people don't really think that two happy gays/lesbians getting married will not signal the end of the world? Of course, at this point, I can't help but post Bill O'Reilly's coverage of the 2009 Miss America controversy:

The cheering crowd at the end of Miss California's answer either a)speaks to the fact that Americans are not yet convinced that gay marriage is less of a threat to them than, say, our current state of economic melt down; or b) people who pay money to attend beauty pageants can't be counted on also hold progressive views about...um...women/sexuality/gays; or c) both a and b. Now, that might not be fair. Miss California also refers to "her country" and something called "opposite marriage". I have no idea what either of those things are...and while Perez was a bit harsh, I don't think that it is crazy to assert that Miss Cali isn't the brightest crayon in the box and perhaps not the best barometer of public sentiment.

Meanwhile, both Iowa and Vermont have legalized gay marriage. New York may be next, if Rudy Giuliani (straight marriage poster boy) doesn't foil the Governor's plans. But how do I feel about all of this? I've taken one to many feminism classes to think that marriage is an amazing unproblematic institution...but I also think that movements around equality issues like police brutality, job discrimination, and violence in general against the LGBTQI community might gain more traction if gay/lesbian relationships are sanctioned and legitimized by marriage. So, while I've pretty much concluded that their are issues facing the LGBTQI community, and more specifically the LGBTQI of Color community, that are more important to me than marriage. However, I think that gay marriage will only help the LGBTQI community as it seeks equality and physical safety. It is encouraging to see that the latest add from the anti-gay marriage advocates has been mocked many times over. Their other adds are equally parody worthy...check this one out. But even with brilliant mock adds (see below) and a shifting of concern from social issues to economic issues, complacency is never an option. Big budget adds against gay marriage speak to an increasingly organized anti-gay movement. Just look at the whole prop 8 ordeal.

A Gaythering Storm from Jane Lynch

Always a Good Idea

2009-04-20T20:04:00.004-04:00

Leaving New Jersey is always a good idea. This weekend I visited my BFF in Ithaca, NY. The picture above makes it look like we had a totally nature-tastic adventure. In reality we spent the weekend doing our favorite this: making fun of people, making fun of tv people, working in coffee shops, shopping, and having fun with BFF's friends. We did take on detour to see Taughannock Falls, the tallest free falling water in North America. We then zoomed off for some wine tasting before a lovely dinner at the Lost Dog Cafe of penne ala vodka.

The Best of Times The Worst of Times

2009-04-11T13:08:00.003-04:00

The best thing about this week: I found a place to live over the summer. It is in a great location and it costs the right amount of money and I don't have to make another trip down to the River City which means I can go see BFF instead. Sweet.

The worst thing about this week: I did not get the external fellowship that I'd hoped to get. This means that, after the news sinks in, I will begin freaking out about how I will both eat and afford a roof over my head in August. So far, my options are a) whirlwind tour of my friends couches for the month of August; b) moving into my adviser's basement; c) sleeping in my car. I have a feeling I'll be doing a combination of all three. Awesome.

Doga: A Sign of the Apocolyps

2009-04-09T18:09:00.002-04:00

Sometimes you've just got to hand it to folks. Sometimes you just have to say, "wow, I should've thought of that but didn't and it is okay that someone else did and is now making money off of it."

One reason to love Rutgers...

2009-04-03T10:24:00.000-04:00

Guiness World Record attempt: Where's Waldo?

Springtime and Missing Songshine

2009-04-02T12:24:00.002-04:00

As many of you readers are, I'm sure, aware: I was in a college a cappella group called Songshine. We recorded albums. We performed and brought joy to the campus. For some reason I'm just missing the group today. I miss singing and being creative with a group of talented women...and laughing and dishing the whole practice. Then I stumbled across this Ben Folds sponsored contest for college groups. Basically, groups covered Folds' songs in hopes of being included on an album of a cappella Folds' hits to benefit the Save the Music Foundation. I think the album comes out iat the end of April. Below is my favorite of all of the potential groups:

Thinking About the Police

2009-03-31T09:57:00.002-04:00

I grew up around cops. My favorite neighbor, Henry, was a cop and his wife was a dispatcher. My best friend's dad was a cop. Actually, now that I think about it, several cops lived on my block as a little kid. I've known cops personally and my parents were friends with them because they were our next door neighbors and they had kids around my age.

I also grew up hearing stories about cops. Stories about my father being pulled over. Stories about the LAPD. When, as kid, I sat with my parents and watched Los Angeles explode with racial tension, I remember my parents take on the LAPD: police brutality, they mumbled, was nothing new. My mother remembered how she'd watched the city burn once before as a little girl. At the famous line, "Can't we all just get along?" I remember her rolling eyes and shaking head.

When I learned to drive my mom had a special talk with me about handling the police: look straight ahead, tell the officer calmly and clearly that you are reaching in the glove compartment for your registration, only roll the window down two inches, always call the officer sir/ma'am. Never stop in an isolated area. Slow down, turn on your hazards, and make them follow you to a crowded location because, as a woman, I was vulnerable to a different brutality than my brothers.

These days, I'm thinking about Oakland. I'm thinking about Moats. I'm thinking about my encounters with the police. Never have I ever had a good experience with a cop serving in an official capacity. I've been pulled over and given a ticket by a particularly arrogant rural Virginia officer. Even the cop who came out to write the police report about my car being broken into was less than helpful, to say the least. The list goes on. When I'm in trouble, the last thing that comes to mind is "call the police". When I see officers on the street (and while here in NYC dog sitting I see plenty), I do not feel more secure. I feel nervous.

The talk that my mother gave me about the police was intended to give me tools to deal with this feeling. She cautioned me that crying and "acting like a girl" were not going to get me anywhere. She told me to keep my wits about me and remain composed while indicating to the office that he/she was in control. This was very important: they have to feel like they're in control or you're screwed. That is the hard part: displays of deference. Walking that tight rope of anxiety. Not responding to an officer who is, say, taunting you. Who is upset that you didn't roll down the window far enough for him to lean in and get in your face. Who is going to write you a ticket for fifteen miles an hour faster than you were going...and then tell you he could write it for more so you should be thankful he didn't. Keeping your eyes fixed in front of you. Calling him "sir".

I'm thinking about the police because my friends have had run-ins with them recently. Because Oakland is not unique. Because Moats could've been my brother. Because feigning deference shouldn't be the only strategy.

House Hunting: Craig's List is Cr-hay-zee

2009-03-27T17:27:00.002-04:00

Craig's List is kinda a craps shoot: sometimes it is crazy and sometimes not. The housing I'm looking to move into in the next month and a half is only temporary and probably going to be sublet out by a student much like myself. So, Craig's list is actually an okay place to look if I'm careful. But seriously.

Add titles:

Awesome Roommate Wanted!
Translation: Be drunk. Be crazy. Be awesome.
My take: While I am awesome and a pretty good roommate, I don't think that paying $500 a month to live with other "awesome" people is a good deal.

Man Cave has One Room Available June 1st!
Translation: Two 25 year old guys, Two large plasma screen tvs, sports parties, and a pool table...dude!
My take: Dude.

Add content:
"I am looking for a female roommate to share trailer...with myself and 18 year old daughter."

"Looking for a student willing to trade free rent for chores."

Walking with Sammy: The Movie

2009-03-24T19:07:00.007-04:00

At first I felt a little awkward filming a dog as we walked down the street. Then I got to Madison Square Park where I saw a man filming a squirrel on a tree stump, a man walking around in hot pants (and not in a good way), and a little kid throwing a fit in the middle of rush hour traffic. So, that ended that awkward feeling. Below you'll find my latest iMovie (watch out--you could be in my next one!)

Walking with Sammy

2009-03-23T11:30:00.003-04:00

I'm currently being hosted in Chelsea by a small furry gentleman. He's cute. He's polite. He mostly sleeps. No problem. Though I have to say I over estimated his little legs. Yesterday, after having slept in, I thought, "Hey, let's take the little man out on a nice long walk. He'll love it." So, I did. We walked for an hour and fifteen min around the neighborhood. He smelled everything. He peed on almost everything. He looked like he was having a good time.

We got back home and I fed him breakfast. Then he started growling. Now, you know I don't play that. I get that he's food possessive and I get that he has needs. So, I went about my business and got ready for the day. I don't want to eat his food and the only way he's going to learn that is if I am totally disinterested in it. So, I went out for my own breakfast and left him and his kibble in peace. I get back an hour later and he hasn't touched the food...no, he's asleep curled around his food bowl. Weird. He usually just inhales it. I go down stairs and work/sleep/read. When I come back upstairs he's still asleep but has marshaled the energy to eat while I was away. Weird.

Our second walk went just fine. He was back to being himself. I wasn't really sure what happened. I mean, he loves walking and food. What went wrong with our morning? Just for kicks I decided to reread his instruction booklet. I'd read it when I got in but just wanted to be sure I didn't miss something like a vitamin or treat or something.

Turns out the little guy is only supposed to walk for 15 to 30min in the morning. I'd walked him for so long that he was too tired to eat and didn't know what else to do so he slept curled around his food...just in case I wanted to eat it. Kinda cute...kinda weird. Not to worry. This morning the walk was 30min and his breakfast vanished in 2min when we got back.

House Hunting

2009-03-21T17:10:00.002-04:00

I went down to the Grand Commonwealth this week to look for places to live this summer. Now, after having heard back from some prospective roommates, I know that my trip was a total failure. Do I have a place? No. Does option B look good? No. (Why would I want to sleep in someone's living room?) Did option C ever answer my email? No. I drove for 10 hours (five down and five back) only to be rejected. Now I've got to rally the troops (that is, rally myself) and continue the hunt. Hopefully I'll find a place to move into soon. But right now I'm going to just accept the fact that the whole trip was for nothing.

New Blog

2009-03-19T19:56:00.003-04:00

I know. I know. Seriously. I'm addicted to blogging and making new blogs to fit my need for more blogging. I know that all of your readers out there just loooove having another site to check for your procrastinating pleasure. However, I promise not to add to your heavy load of procrastination destinations. Here's the deal. Nat's Neighborhood is going on vacation. I may come back to blogging in that space when I'm in the writing phase of my dissertation. However, a recent trip down to Old Dominion has inspired a new blog about life as a researcher this summer. So, check out The Grand Olde Commonwealth and tell me what you think.

O'bama?

2009-03-16T14:58:00.003-04:00

President Obama is about 3% Irish on his mother's side. So, just like the villagers in Obama, Japan, the people in the Irish village that his great-great-grandfather came from are excitedly awaiting the President's visit. They've even taken to spelling his last name "O'bama". "Move over, St. Patrick,"shouts one interviewee. Move over. Indeed.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Best Friend!

2009-03-15T18:40:00.003-04:00

Best Friend (aka Gay Husband) will be here in mere minutes. I am so excited to take him to a local restaurant and have him meet Ms. Cheese! The last time he met some of my friends, said friends ended up kinda drunk and may or may not have poured a glass of wine into my chocolate ice cream. Ms. Cheese has promised not to pour beverages in or on my dessert. Be on the look out for a video (yes, V now has iMovie and she's not afraid to use it) of me and BFGH!

Bad Art

2009-03-11T15:22:00.003-04:00

While surfing the net with my buddy, Ms. Cheese, I came across something worth posting/sharing. I was actually reading a report in a British news paper about the tent cities popping up in states like California and Nevada. In the bottom corner of the web page there was a link to a website dedicated to bad paintings of Barack Obama: click here.
I'm not really sure what to think. I've noticed the amount of really bad likenesses of the President. He's on t-shirts, pens, plates, and valueless plastic coated coins amongst other things. The website features a range though. Some of the pictures were obviously drawn by gradeschoolers excited about the election. Of course there are a fair amount of paintings by grown adults. Some are hokey...others are just scary (see below).

A Nice Day

2009-03-07T13:44:00.006-05:00

Today is a nice day. And look, some plant life has decided to say an early hello. It is funny that just last weekend I was blogging about the predicted snow fall. This weekend, it is sixty degrees and sunny.

Trash TV: Toddlers, Tiaras, and 18 Duggars

2009-03-04T17:00:00.004-05:00

After a long day of databasing or note taking on source material or reading court documents I like some trash TV. The kind of TV that involves a contestant choosing his/her "one true love" from a line up of 20 people he/she has been dating on national television...or, say, TV that travels the country looking for the best voice a little time in the studio can manufacture...or TV that asks you to take a look at how who aren't you live their daily lives.

TLC (The Learning Chanel) has a whole range of shows that indulge this guilty pleasure of mine. But, lately, I've started to have a bit of a conscience about the programing that the network produces. I got hooked watching John & Kate Plus 8, a show about a couple's life trying to raise eight children (they had twins and then, wanting just one more, ended up with sextuplets--thanks to fertility treatments). It is cute and funny and totally crazy. Kate has a cleaning compulsion. John is totally laid back. They live in Pennsylvania. Somehow, everyone gets fed and bathed and loved.

The network, of course, has more shows about families. There are the Rolloffs and their show, Little People Big World. The Rolloffs are little people as is one of their children. Their other three children are normal height. The show basically raises awareness of LP (little people) issues and highlights the way in which their family functions just like other families. For the most part I find that Little People Big World does a lot to combat assumptions about little people and how they function in the world. The Rolloffs also own and operate their own pumpkin farm to make ends meet. So, isn't as ridiculous as the premise makes it sound.

Of course, there are the Duggars. They live in Arkansas and have eighteen children. They're all homeschooled. They're super conservative Christians. This show is as crazy as the premise makes it seem. I'm not sure which episode was more priceless: Duggars visit NYC or Duggars visit San Francisco. I feel like their family website says it best.

I think that there's a line. Perhaps the Duggars are the line. But, TLC's latest show, Toddlers in Tiaras crosses that thin fragile line into the rhelm of "V cannot take it anymore" land. Last night I watched as people in Eastern Kentucky and West Virginia entered their infant through 18 yearolds in a beauty pagent. It had some name like "universal royalty" or "supreame starship" or "batttle royale". I can't remember. I don't know if it was the spray tan on the six yearold or the eye lashes on the toddler...but I just couldn't take it. I think what really topped it all off was the comercial after the show for a weekend line up of "The Half Ton Mom", "Half Ton Dad", and "Half Ton Teenager". I suddenly felt like a sideshow guest. Maybe I'm just over reacting. Maybe I shouldn't throw rocks seeing as I like other shows on the network. But, really, a ton and a half weekend? Seriously?

Snow Day 2.0

2009-03-02T14:48:00.006-05:00

I went on a snow walking adventure to hand over my rent this afternoon and I got these pictures of the snow. This amount of snow isn't really that awing but I felt the need to record it as it provided me (and the entire neighborhood of kids) with a snow day.

Snow Day

2009-03-02T00:17:00.004-05:00

Snow is so quiet. It just kinda shows up in a blanket and waits for some one to see it. The seeing is followed by shoveling and scraping and feeling cold. For a moment though you get to just see the snow and appreciate it. I'm looking forward to a day spent at the homestead, eating warm foods, watching the storm continue all day long. I have a snow day outfit all ready: pj pants, a long sleeve shirt from college, a sweatshirt from college, and a snowflake embellished hat. I will read and course plan and then go out in the snow. I will sled for the first time in years and get cold. I will watch dumb tv and warm up and nap.

It has been a while since it last visited us here. We've had slush and ice and slush/ice. We've had rain and some "wintry mix". But tonight, tonight a real storm is here. We've got a snow day on campus--not that that helps someone who is done with classes. It still feels like a snow day though. It still feels like I should be going to bed a little bit hopeful.

Snow day.

Sunday Morining

2009-03-01T10:06:00.002-05:00

I left the warmth of my comfy bed this morning intending to attend a 10am service. Of course, I forgot that for the past month of Sundays (sometimes twice in a service) we've all been cautioned to remember that the new service time will be 10:30. So, I decided to have my coffee before service this week and busted out the laptop with the intent of writing a Sunday morning post.

Here, in the medium sized city that I attend church in, there is a lot of activity for a Sunday morning. This may have something to do with a fairly large orthodox population who celebrate the sabbath on Friday-Saturday and have their weekend on Sundays. But in the the little city, most of the population is black, Latino, or undergraduate (or some combination of the three). Here in the local Starbucks there are a couple of students and some people like me who forgot that service starts at 10:30 today. Mostly there are men who live in the streets or under bridges playing cards or reading scraps of newspaper. Some sneak cheaper coffee from other places into the place with little success. Others sip on a cup of something for hours enjoying the warmth. They're here to meet some friends and get out of the light snowfall outside.

I guess I share more in common with the professor at the end of the counter--the guy still wearing his coat and hat trying to get through a few papers before he has to be somewhere else trying to grade a few papers. But the street men, I think, are like me this morning. I haven't been to church in a while. I stepped out into the streets and lived under some pretty unsteady bridges for a while. I learned some things and saw some things.

Maybe one day, when I enter a church, I won't feel like a bum seeking some warmth anymore.

Dissertating...

2009-02-27T13:59:00.002-05:00

I feel slumpy.

Slumpy is like grumpy but more lazy and more sarcastic.

So, yesterday I read a book by another historian who plans to write a book about my dissertation topic. Then I updated my database and organized. Then I began reading a delightfully wacktastic book about slave rebellion written in 1900. I went to the gym. I brought sorbet over to my friends' house for dinner. I went home after some wonderful conversation and went to bed. I woke up this morning, checked the interweb for news and email and such, then went to lunch with a friend. Now, I'm sitting in a coffee shop, typing on my computer surrounded by other people doing the same thing. This is what dissertating looks like.

Sure, I'm teaching a class about slave narratives starting next weekend. Oh, and I threw in a class at a local youth correctional center on the Reconstruction. I even go to talks and campus events. But, for the most part, dissertating has proven to be a combination of library/coffee shop work sessions and fights with the inter-library loan staff at my university.

I go to the gym five days a week.

I thought dissertating was going to be exciting. I thought that it was going to be the best step in the long PhD process. But it isn't. Its just the part that takes the most endurance. My project is massive. I have to just plug along a bit every day one source at a time. I have to organize (not my strong point) and keep on top of things. I have to be content with calling what happened yesterday a productive day. I got through an important secondary source. I managed to keep my database up to date and organized. I'm working through a very long, very hard to read, totally racist, primary/secondary source written in 1900. That's something. That's making progress. But it doesn't feel like it.

It feels like treading water.

Twitter: What your students are doing instead of listening to your lecture.

2009-02-25T18:40:00.003-05:00

Twitter is not a new thing. It is just new to me. A recent computer purchase inspired some quality procrastination time spent on facebook. As you may or may not know there is a Twitter like feature on facebook that allows one to post exactly what he or she is doing (or at least something witty) for all of his or her friends to see and comment on. I've been in the habit of posting my status twice or even three times a day, checking back to see if anyone has commented, and making up new witty things about some aproximation of what I'm actually doing. Then I saw and add up on some web page for Twitter and thought, "Well what the heck you like posting on facebook...why not try out what everyone has been talking about?"

This is what my students are doing instead of listening to my lecture? They're checking in on everyone they know...so that they can know exactly what they're doing? I now know that one of my colleagues is working on her dissertation. (No she's not. She's on Twitter.) I also know that someone I knew in college is going out for drinks. (Okay, I knew her in college...whenever I remember her...I imagine that she's drinking. No new info there.)

I think I could make a lot of money on a site where you post what you imagine your friends are doing and then they make comments about how funny what you imagined is and how it is "so true". All I need now is a catchy name. But, in the mean time, I'll be Twittering for the rest of the week. I'll report on it later...that is if it doesn't take over my life.

Manhattan: One Hell of a Drink

2009-02-22T15:03:00.005-05:00

Sometimes you gotta cut loose. You gotta just say, "Hey, I'm gonna have a couple of drinks after dinner and not care if I can do school work tomorrow." Now, there was a time I had that thought too often for my own good. (It ain't a party if it happens every night.) But, now that I've gained some perspective and grown into my grad student status, I found myself thinking about cutting loose on Friday night for the first time in a very loooong time. So, I did.
Don't worry. I did some work at NYU's Library. And yes, there were students barricaded in the dining hall next to the library. And no, they weren't nearly as good at staging a protest as Berkley's Tree People. (I mean, really, the dinning hall? That'll show 'um. There's nowhere else to eat in all of NYC. Whatever happened to chaining yourself to objects in the library?) After the work at the library and ample protester watching with my buddy Ms. Cheese, I headed to an academic talk at CUNY's grad center. The talk was amazing. The Korean food after the talk, not as amazing on my intestines. But, and here's the cut loose part, Ms. Cheese and I decided to head to an old man bar for a drink.

And an old man bar we found. There was an oil painting of a naked lady above the bar. The bar was mostly scotch and bourbon with some high end gin and vodka for good measure. For Ms. Cheese, a Kettle One martini up with a twist. For me, a rye Manhattan, up. (For you drinkers out there: a Manhattan is traditionally always made with rye. However, not all bartenders know this...or have rye available...so, sometimes you have to specify...though if you're in an old man bar in Manhattan feel free to just order the drink.)

A couple of Manhattans later I was on my way to discovering that two years "off the sauce" has rendered me too old to go out drinking until 2am. Seriously. The next thing I knew Ms. Cheese and I were singing Stevie Wonder on our way downtown to Cubbyhole. Then, there I was, hungover, reaching for Advil like a rock star at 1pm on Saturday. A Manhattan is one hell of a drink.

Things learned:

1. I really like whiskey.
2. I really like old man bars.
3. I do not like being hung over.
4. I like singing with Ms. Cheese.
5. Stevie Wonder really is the best choice for drunken singing in the streets of NYC.

(Photo from: http://eatdrinkbetter.com/files/2008/10/manhattan.jpg)

Drag Queens!

2009-02-15T19:21:00.002-05:00

Okay, it is time for a true confession: I've always wished I could be a Drag Queen. I love the wigs. I love the flamboyant outfits. I love the Fab-a-lous! Paris is Burning is one of my favorite movies of all time. My mantra, "We're not here to be shady, just fierce!", a beautiful black queen said it first, honey.

And now RuPaul has her own show on Logo Network: RuPaul's Drag Race! It is Project Runway, American Idol, and America's Next Top Model all rolled into one. All I can say is, WORK!

I'm a Luva AND a Fighter

2009-02-14T15:07:00.002-05:00

It is the one day a year that some of us dread...some of us deny...and some of us get mushy on despite ourselves. To all who've shown me love and tenderness this year: may that love come back to you in exponentially increasing amounts of good karma. To those who've done some hating this year: may you feel love from someone and decide to spread it around.

Here's a music video that will hopefully make lovers, haters, and fighters smile...I mean, who doesn't love a shoulder jutting dance scene? :

On Ice

2009-02-09T21:05:00.002-05:00

I try to avoid being cold as a rule. Part of avoiding being cold involves avoiding ice...unless it is in my glass of bourbon. But this weekend I decided to cast aside my desire to be warm at all times and headed to the local ice rink with some grad student buddies. I'm happy to report that I didn't fall once. After some early white knuckling of the rink wall, I started to glide with ease. I did have to dodge a six year old in hockey pads (he's in orange in the photo below) who couldn't help but crash into adults that looked particularly shaky. Other than that, I was totally fine. I may even go back next weekend.

Octopi in Love

2009-02-05T19:04:00.001-05:00

I will never eat octopus at the Greek place again.

The West Coast has the Sunshine...

2009-02-05T11:45:00.003-05:00

Seriously.It is cold here. I want to go home. I want to go home "where the girls all get so tan"...right now. This is an SOS. I must--have--sunshine...

Can we please go see this?

2009-02-01T19:45:00.001-05:00

Skip ahead to min 2:12.

Super Bowl Sunday

2009-01-29T19:30:00.002-05:00

I was surfing around YouTube and came across, what I think, is the best National Anthem of all time. I'm not a fan of patriotic music or even the Super Bowl. I mostly watch for the commercials. But when Whitney sang it, when she opened her mouth and let out those first few notes, the country collectively got chills. She didn't over sing it. She didn't under sing it. She just sang. Watching the cloudy YouTube video with less than optimum sound I still get chills. So, we'll see if this weekend's anthem can compare. Oh, and, Go Steelers! (That's for you Roxy.)

Computa Machine: How you like them apples?

2009-01-27T19:24:00.004-05:00

Everyone knows the money is the root of all research. I've just spent months and months begging for money using every persuasive writing technique I know...that is writing grant proposals and applications. But now that the dissertation proposal has been defended and I've been cast in to the purgatory that is ABD status, I'm finding that I need that money I spent time begging for sooner rather than later. First of all, the recession that we "weren't having" but that we are now in anyway has been kicking my butt. Three jobs or none, I tried hard to become comfortable no avail last semester. Awesome.

Now, my computa machine is on the fritz. She's not terminally ill...she's just elderly and on the brink of something big as her more frequent screen freezes seem to be forewarning. The pisser is that now I've got to buy a new computa machine to avoid the panick of the last time I got a computer. Then I was minding my own business when my computer just decided he was too tired to go on...and he took my first semester's work with him into a coma until a good friend managed, through some manner of magic and sorcery, to salvage my information. Then came the scramble to have a new machine before second semester. I remember clinching my fist and promising myself that never again would I be without a computer in the midst of a big project.

(Cue dissertation reserach.)

So here I am going from website to website, Apple Store to Apple Store, enthusiastic Apple employee to enthusiastic Apple employee, looking for some sort of deal. The bottom line is that MacBooks are damn expensive. No joke. I mean they're pretty and all of my friends have them and I just know that having Garage Band will make me into a rockstar...but what's a grad student to do? The answer is to buy the new computa machine on credit and pay it off bit by bit (just like every other major purchase is purchased). The good news: I have an external hard drive which will delay the nessesity of a new computer. The bad news: I still have to buy a new computer before I go to the archive this summer.

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